


Family Damages Lead to Bandages

by UnicornPopcorn14



Category: Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles (TV 2012), Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles - All Media Types
Genre: Angst, Angst and Hurt/Comfort, Bad guys die, Blood, Drama, Fanart, Gen, Mikey hurt, Mild Swearing, Misunderstanding, NOT A ONE SHOT, Purple Dragons are badasses, Suffering, Weapons, You May Cry, fluffy fluff, may or maynot be a birthday special, no T-Cest, tmntweek
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-04-01
Updated: 2020-07-02
Packaged: 2021-02-28 21:26:40
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 7
Words: 20,480
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23443951
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/UnicornPopcorn14/pseuds/UnicornPopcorn14
Summary: Set out after The Gauntlet (1x9). Actions have consequences, and the three elder brothers will soon realize that their words do greater harm than good.
Relationships: Donatello & Leonardo & Michelangelo & Raphael (TMNT), Michelangelo & Raphael (TMNT)
Comments: 56
Kudos: 159





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> This has NOTHING to do with the following episodes, and I specifically mean 'Panic in the Sewers'. I'm just giving my own version of the post shredder fight scene, so everything that has happened in the next episodes aren't with me.

It was late in New York City, the chilly air blowing the surface as it announced that rain would start falling soon. For some people, it was time to make up the bed and tuck themselves under the blanket to sleep. For other people, it was their time to commit any kind of robbery then vanish before the police would come.

While for our four mutant siblings, it was time to go on patrol after a long day of waiting.

The turtles cheered while hopping from one building to another, receiving fresh wind blowing on their skin. It refreshed them greatly after hours staying under the sewers, and it renewed their energy to be able to fight whoever stood on their way.

"Wheehoo!" Michelangelo hollered in excitement, feeling like a new turtle all over again. Aside from that fact, he was also trying to feel some enjoyment as much as possible. It may sound weird, but what was happening in the lair these days was really taking a toll on him.

Since their first encounter with the Shredder, things began to slowly change between the small family of five. Master Splinter started giving them intense training for hours, with short intervals between them that roughly lasted 30 minutes. Furthermore, he forbade them from going topside, and grounded them for three days. That, of course, led to exhaustion and tension. Their Sensei became very strict; and Mikey understood why. It was their punishment for becoming overconfident. But it just became unbearable.

Apparently, Mikey wasn't the only one feeling this way. He noticed the stress that was overcoming his three brothers as well. Leo and Raph, for example, fought a lot more with each other. Donnie became more distressed and uptight, always shutting himself in his lab, and distracting himself with new discoveries or inventions. Sometimes Mikey would try to settle some arguments -either if they were between two of his brothers, or all three-, sometimes it worked; but other times, he received harsh comments like: "get lost" or "who invited you here?" or even get engaged in the argument himself until Master Splinter cooled off the heat.

A slight frown crossed the orange-clad's face, disappearing as soon as it came. He wouldn't think about the bad stuff right now. He just needed to enjoy his moment and focus.

Huh… _focus_. Something that he had been missing lately. Was it because of the strain that was put on him from his brothers and father? Or the amount of time he, and _specifically he_ , spent training? Or because he never even reminded himself to do that before? Maybe all… But now, he really needed that reassurance of staying focused. He wouldn't bare being blamed or called out by his brothers one more time. He wouldn't want to be the reason for them to fight again.

In anyway, he wouldn't even try to settle it if it happened. Raph was about to punch him the last time if it weren't for Don to stop him. Eventually, the red-clad cooled off and gave a flat apology later, but Mikey made a promise to himself to not get into arguments unless it involved him.

The youngest shook his noddle while running. Man, this was really getting over his head.

All of a sudden, while the ninjas were running at full speed, Leo came into a halt, raising a hand as a sign for the other three to stop as well. Raph and Don quickly hit their brakes, while Mikey, too distracted in his own thoughts, didn't realize in time and bumped into Raph, who bumped into Donnie, who bumped into Leo; almost causing him to fall off the rooftop before Donnie caught his shell.

After short yelps, Mikey rubbed the part of his head that came in contact with Raphael's back and glanced up, to receive angry eyes glaring at him.

"Mikey!" They all hissed, and the freckled turtle shrank.

"S-sorry, I-" He began in an inaudible whisper.

"Would you look where you're going?!" The hot-head scolded with a light push on Mikey's shoulder, "Fearless was about to get his shell broke because of your clumsiness!"

The smartest turtle stepped in the way, "Hey, don't talk to him like that!"

"Oh, and why do you defend him so much, genius?" Raph crossed his arms while scoffing, "You too were about to turn into turtle-stew down there."

"I didn't mean it, okay?" Mikey defended himself.

Donnie nodded, "He probably wasn't focusing, Raph. Don't make a big deal out of nothing!"

"Well, the big deal here is that Mikey _wasn't focusing_!" Raph yelled a little bit loud.

"Guys! Would you mind?!" Leo whisper-shouted with a motion of his hand, "Something fishy is going down there!"

Donatello approached Leo to look down, and Raph didn't come closer before giving Mikey a disgusted roll of an eye. Mikey ignored it for the moment, busy scolding himself for being -yet again- the reason of another fighting. He too approached the edge with no words, trying to shrug off what just happened. Gosh, he wondered how Raph did it so easily.

In the vast alleyway were a van and one guy standing in the back of it, holding a large tree branch and tapping it onto his hand, clearly guarding the vehicle. Beside the van was a jewelry shop, and two men suddenly came out running from it, holding massive bags from inside the dark store.

"Purple Dragons…" Donnie scowled upon realizing the purple tattoos on every arm of each robber.

"Oh, they picked the wrong night to throw off a party." Raph smirked, pulling out his Sais.

"No, wait." Leo held up a hand before the red-clad could get up, causing Raph to look up at him quizzically.

"The shell, Leo? They're right there!" He argued.

"We need to have a plan." Leo said without taking his eyes off the men.

Raph's exited form dropped, "Oh, c'mon!" he covered his eyes while still holding the Sais in his hands, "We can just get this over with!"

This time, Leo turned to look at him, "I give orders here!"

' _Here goes…_ ' Both Don and Mikey thought, predicting what was going to happen.

"Well, I don't know why _you_ give orders, anyway!" Raph scoffed.

Leo couldn't keep his cool anymore, "And I don't know why you're such an annoying hot-head!"

"I'm sure Splinter's still questioning why he chose you to handle leader-ship!"

"As if you would do any better!"

"Of course I'd do better. At least I don't wait for the bad guys to have tea in order to kick their butts!"

"Well, a plan is necessary to perform everything perfectly!"

"Who cares about performance when they're dealing with criminals and robbers?!"

"GUYS!" Donnie interrupted, making both elders glare at him, "The van is getting away!"

Leo immediately glanced down, and indeed, the sound of the van engine was fading, while four Purple dragons down the alleyway were cornering a woman with a purse.

"Happy now, Splinter Jr.?" Raph asked sarcastically.

"I'll deal with you later." Leo hissed in a threatening tone, "Don, you're with me. We'll chase the van to the next alleyway and give them a piece of our minds. Raph, you're with Mikey. We'll communicate through our T-phones."

"Why am _I_ with Mikey?!" Raph yelled, not noticing the slight wince of hurt from the youngest.

"No time to argue, help that woman!"

Raph groaned in irritation as he watched Leo and Donnie hop to the opposite rooftop. Without even glancing at his brother, he took down the fire-escape ladder and landed in front of the alleyway entrance, the shadows making him look like a monster. Mikey tried to shove everything in the back of his mind to be able to fight. Landing down as Raph already started beating up the guys, Michelangelo quickly picked up the woman who fell unconscious to a safer place outside the alley.

"MIKEY, ARE YOU WANDERIN' OFF AGAIN!?" Raph yelled roughly with his Sais in front of him, trying to defend himself from a quite strong thug. He couldn't understand what Mikey had been doing as he saw him empty-handed while getting back inside the alley. Mikey ignored the fact of using the word 'again' as if he'd ever done that before, and didn't even try to explain himself. He just mumbled a "sorry" and got into fighting stance.

Just as Mikey approached, he heard Raph let out a yelp. The youngest turned to behold Raph's upper-arm with a knife inside, and an ugly gash, letting out blood. Mikey immediately took out his ninja stars and sent it flying towards the thug's head over his brother, causing him to fall limp, dead.

Raph groaned, taking the knife out for it to splash more blood on the asphalt. Mikey winced as he saw red coating his brother's arm, but decided to focus on the other three gang members before checking on him.

Raph sat down, grimacing because of his throbbing limb. He scowled at Mikey when he wasn't noticing, blaming him for everything. Yes, Mikey saved his life, but if he just focused a little more Raph wouldn't be in such condition. He'd lecture his younger brother later.

The red-clad got up and started kicking shell with Mikey. And soon, the four thugs were unconscious. Raph got out a rope and tied all four of them up then called the police, vanishing with his brother before the siren sounds got close.

Once they landed on the upper roof, Mikey got close to inspect his brother's wound "A-are you oka-"

"DON'T… touch me." Raph spat as he spanked the younger's hand away.

"Raph I-" Mikey said as he attempted to touch him again.

"I said, don't touch me!" Just as Raph growled at him, he took off running towards the rest of his brothers.

Mikey stayed put for some minutes, wondering what to do to let his brother listen to him. He hung his head as he ran after the hot-head, choosing to be in the back in order to not receive any more comments.

The journey back to the other two was dead silent, as Raph was shooting venomous glares, making the younger shrink with each glance. Mikey knew that he'd be able to explain himself once he got back to Leo and Donnie. At least they would listen to him.

The moment Mikey noticed the blue-banded and the purple-banded on the opposite roof, he picked up his pace in the sake of arriving at the same time as Raph; to not let the others jump into conclusions. Unfortunately, that didn't work, because as soon as Leo and Don took notice of Raph's gash, they gasped in horror.

"Raph! Are you alright?" Leo was the first to ask.

"What happened?!" Don exclaimed in question.

Raph huffed, "If you wanna ask someone, why not shell-for-brains over there?" He snapped while turning around to glare at the youngest.

The other two followed Raph as well,

"Mikey…?" Leo questioned in a scolding tone.

"What did you do this time?" Don asked in a tired tone.

Mikey opened his mouth to justify himself, "I-I was-"

Raph cut him off before speaking, "He wandered in the middle of the fight! I can't believe he lost focus again!" The hot-head started pacing while swinging his good arm, "Now, my blood's pourin' out because of him!"

Leo was now really glaring at orange-clad, "Did that happen, Mikey?"

"No, no, that's not what happened! I-"

"I'm sick of his irresponsibility, Leo!" Once again, Mikey's speech was cut off by Raph. "I'm not gonna get paired up with him again! Donnie can be with him. I'm done!"

The three were focusing on the hot head too much that they didn't notice the pained expression from their youngest brother.

"Oh, so I just keep getting stuck with Mikey again?!" Donatello complained, "Not gonna happen! Leo can have him."

Mikey flinched.

"NO!" Leo bellowed.

"Why not?!" Raph interjected.

"I-I don't know… I don't want him…" Leo stated hesitantly.

Mikey's knuckles balled.

"And I'm not risking my life because of him," Raph yelled, "You're the leader, you just said it, you have him!"

"Well, Donnie should be responsible for him as well, since he's also in the B-Team." Leo said.

Mikey gritted his teeth.

"If you're just gonna throw away your problems on me, then fat chance!" Donnie crossed his arms.

And that was the last straw,

"WHY DON'T YOU JUST SAY THAT YOU DON'T WANT ME IN THE TEAM?!" Mikey hollered in a mix of pain and anger, running off to the opposite roof then using his smoke bombs, and vanishing.

"MIKEY!" Leo called out after coughing.

Raph's expression was indifferent, "Oh, great. Look at what you did!" He stormed, targeting Leo.

" _I_ did?!" Leo shouted in incredulity, "You were the one who started complaining!"

"Guys, shouldn't we focus on the bigger problems right now?!" Donnie yelled angrily, "Mikey's getting away!"

Raph rolled his eyes with a wave of a hand, "Leave him. He's probably gonna be back before the sun rises."

Leo rose an eyebrow in disbelief, "Can't you just have some culpability?!"

Raph scowled, "I'm sick of him. And you know what? I'm not gonna chase after him! If he wanna be a whiny baby, then let him be…" he turned around, walking away.

"Where are you going?!" Don asked.

"I'm heading back to treat this." Raph responded while pointing at his wound, "Have fun you two."

And with that, Raph landed down the alleyway, leaving both Leo and Don sharing glances.

**TMNT**

Michelangelo was running, just running. Where to? He didn't know. He just wanted to stay away from his brothers as much as possible.

He sprinted in a dark empty street, feeling tears threating to fall. Mikey didn't let them be, and quickly wiped the salty drops off his eyes.

Coming into a halt after getting tired, the freckled turtle panted in exhaustion, not even looking around to know where he'd arrived.

"Not the first time they toss me around like that…" He growled under his breath, remembering the similar incident three days ago at the Kraang's base.

Michelangelo got out his T-Phone and threw it with full force at the side of the building, thus breaking it, "If they don't want me, they won't find me."

The jokester panted in fatigue, trying to steady his breaths. He was just so… angry with them. He was so angry with himself. Making the right thing caused rebuke, then what the hell would they do if he actually did the _wrong thing_?!

"Why don't they just say it to my face!?" Mikey continued scolding, kicking the ground hardly.

"I'm trying my best to not snap, and they're only making fun of me!" He punched the side of the building hardly.

"They think that I'm weak!" Another punch.

"They think that I don't care!" A kick.

"They think that I'm a burden!" A third punch.

"Leo doesn't want me…" Mikey's eyes started turning white with fury, his knuckles beginning to scrape.

"Donnie believes that I'm a problem…" The wall started to crack.

"And Raph thinks that he's risking his life being with me!" The crack deepened

'" _And that's why no one wants to be with you!"_ ' Upon remembering the second-oldest's cruel words at the Kraang's base, Mikey let out a strong howl, giving the poor wall a final punch.

The wall crashed as rubble fell, and Mikey stood there, watching as the bulwark came down, revealing a dark empty room on the other side.

Mikey's blue eyes reappeared again, looking over his throbbing knuckles that started letting out blood.

His exhaustion and emotions came over him, and he started tearing up, falling to his knees, "What am I doing?" he chocked, holding his hands together to stop the bleeding. He turned to the communicator he just broke, as his lip quivered, letting the teardrops wet his mask and then roll down his cheek. He never knew that there would be a day where he acts exactly like his hot-head brother.

Rain started pouring down like bullets, getting mixed with Michelangelo's salty water. He didn't move, didn't even flinch, but embraced his emotional roller-coaster while still grasping his hand.

Suddenly, footsteps sounded, and Mikey whipped his head towards the doer, who were seven men looking down at him with wicked smirks.

"Oh, look at what we have here…" The closest one to Mikey scoffed.

Mikey got above his knees, scowling when spotting the purple tattoos on their arms.

"Hey, isn't that one of the frogs who took our stolen jewelry?!" Someone in the back yelled.

The closest one frowned, and inspected the ninja to try to confirm the statement. But Mikey beat him to talking, "Yes, it's me."

The leader glowered, getting angry, "So you're brave enough to admit it, freak?" He clicked the chains in his hands, "You don't know who you're talking to, do you?"

Mikey sarcastically looked down at him, "Mmhm, probably a member of the stupid gang whom I kicked their butts."

Some of the listeners gasped while the boss growled, but his scowl quickly faded and turned into a smirk, "And you're one of the four turtles whom my gang mates stabbed one…"

Mikey's eyes widened as the flashback of Raph screaming in pain echoed in his mind, resulting into a deep frown on his face. He spun his nun-chucks, ready to fight, "Why don't you just bring it on?"

The seven guys yelled with their weapons, targeting the youngest ninja. The boss was the first to strike, aiming his chains to catch Mike's abdomen. Mikey dodged instantly, smirking, "You can't play old tricks on me, dude." He hopped fast between the crowd and stuck on the side on the building for a femtosecond, his eyes whitening as he let go and spun in the air, welting the leader's hair with a heel kick, and landing on the ground.

The leader froze for some seconds, before his skull poured down blood, and dropped unconscious to the ground.

Scared glances landed on the orange-clad, some screamed as they approached their motionless leader, while some grabbed their weapons, ready to attack the youngest. Mike's eyes narrowed with a grin.

He's gonna have so much fun.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Oh, boy! I hope it's exciting enough to keep you hanging. Don't worry; it only goes downhill from here!  
> Gotta admit, Raph's lines were pretty trippy. I'm not very good with slang language.
> 
> I'm sorry for making the Purple Dragons kinda OP, but I like them as the main monsters in this story. I don't like the way the 2012 show portrayed them as weak-ass three guys; 2003 did them better in my opinion.


	2. Chapter 2

Leo and Donnie stayed some seconds on the roof, looking back and forth at where their brothers went. Both of them were thinking the same thing, and were trying to make-up their minds about the same situation.

Don opened his mouth to ask the oldest quietly, “What do you think, Leo?”

Leonardo stared at the ground he was standing on for a moment, “I think… we should give Mikey sometime to calm down. He knows the city better than us. He’d be back.” The eldest stated with a shrug.

Donnie nodded in some hesitance, then looked up as the sky growled, “It’s about to rain soon.” He turned around to face Leo again, “Do you think Mikey would get himself in trouble?”

The blue-clad gave a laugh, “Are you kidding? We’re talking about _Mikey_ here! Of course he’d get in trouble.” Donnie laughed along with Leo, “He’ll probably give us a call if he needs a hand…”

“Besides,” Leonardo added while crossing his arms, “I’m sure you don’t want Raph to try and treat himself.”

Donnie’s head snapped upon hearing this, “Oh my God, you’re right!” He immediately turned around and ran where Raph went.

Leo shook his head with a smile, remembering the one and only time Raph tried to treat a wound, and he ended up blowing Donnie’s whole lab up. The eldest hopped and ran after his brothers, frowning upon remembering an important hitch they missed.

‘ _What would Master Splinter think about all of this?_ ’

**TMNT**

Raphael entered the lair without a greeting, not very willing to confront his father. The same frown from the moment he started to scold Mikey was still plastered on his face. He winced as his wound started throbbing again, heading towards Donnie’s lab to find the first aid-kit. Hopefully he’d do it right this time.

He was sure that the rest of his brothers were following the youngest by now, and he was sure that they would find him sooner or later to bring him back. Raph wouldn’t completely assume that he’d be happy with Mikey’s presence at the moment, or any time later. He was fed up by his baby brother’s mistakes and immaturity. His foolish acts at the Kraang’s base were the main reason of leaving Mr. O’neal behind, and were the cause of fighting with the Shredder at all, which also made Splinter give them these intense trainings every day.

And after all of this, Mikey still thinks that they want him around? Well, shell no!

Did he regret calling out his brother like that? No. But did he feel that his words were too much? Probably. But still, that doesn’t deny the fact that Mikey needed to hear those words in order to wake up. He needs more focus. He needs more training. He needs to take things seriously. What the hell was he thinking about when he left the alleyway suddenly and for no reason? Cupcakes and unicorns?!

Raph was strolling so slowly towards the lab and was so into his thoughts that he didn’t hear his father calling him; and didn’t realize the wall in front of him. His fore-head came in contact with the door of Donnie’s lab, making Raph step back slightly and groan, snapping back to reality to finally hear his father who was now behind him,

“RAPHAEL!”

Raph jumped and turned around, startled by his Sensei’s loud voice. He calmed down after putting a hand on his chest, letting out a breath, “Geez, Sensei, you scared me.”

Splinter’s eyes suddenly widened, “What happened to your arm, my son?”

Raph’s head perked slightly, remembering his wound, and _the cause_ of it, “It was Mikey,” he growled.

Splinter’s fearful expression caught Raph off guard, “You brother attacked you?” He yelled.

Raph flinched as he realized how bad he mouthed the sentence, “No! No, of course not!” ‘ _He wouldn’t dare, anyway,_ ’ he continued in his mind, “It’s just that _he_ was the reason I got this.”

The old rat seemed to settle, but still frowned, “You will meet me at the dojo after you treat your wound…” Splinter paused, “Where are the rest of your brothers, anyway?” He raised an eyebrow.

Raph waved his good hand, “Mikey ran off and Leo and Donnie are bringing-”

Suddenly, heavy footsteps sounded as the said turtles entered the lair, stopping and panting in tiredness. Don patted himself on the back after seeing Raph _out of his lab_ , _untreated_.

Raph’s eyes widened upon noticing his brothers, approaching them, “W-Where is Mikey?” He asked in hesitance, trying not to show his concern.

“We didn’t follow him.” Leo answered after straightening, crossing his arms.

Raph raised an eyebrow, “Why not?”

Leo pointed behind Raph with a grin, and the red-clad turned around to see Donnie teleporting from one place to another, hugging his lab inside and out, and complementing it,

“Oh, my baby, I’m glad that you’re safe!” “Thank God nothing happened to you!” “Good thing Raph didn’t touch you!” And so on…

Raph formed a boring expression, provoked by Donnie’s actions. He turned back to Leo, “And… will you look for him later?”

Leo shrugged nonchalantly.

“What’s that supposed to mean?” Raph frowned as Leo passed him and flopped on the couch.

“We should give him some time to let off some heat…”

“Wow, what a responsible leader!” Raph scoffed sarcastically.

Leo’s head snapped, giving a glare, “Oh, yeah? Then why don’t _you_ go after him, _Raph_? Oh, right, you were the one who sent him off in the first place!” He argued.

“Why are you talking as if _I_ was the only one who did that?! You guys did it worse than me! _You_ should go and look for him.”

“Why do you even care?! Of course you don’t want Mikey around at the moment, so why make a big deal about him?!”

Raph paused as he couldn’t find a proper answer for that. Really, why? He was angry at him; and usually when he’s angry at any of his brothers, he wouldn’t want to see their faces around him. Maybe the reason of him arguing too much about the youngest was because… he was having a bad feeling in his stomach.

“M-Maybe because… I’m kinda worried…” Raph said in a quiet tone, instantly hoping that Fearless wouldn’t hear.

Too bad he did, “Wait, what?”

“I’m kinda worried,” Raph repeated, “I-I don’t know…” He paused, “You know what, forget it. I’m gonna go get help from Donnie.” He stormed before heading towards the lab.

Leo stood for some seconds watching his brother’s shell, and raising an eyebrow.

Raph stepped inside Donnie’s lab, seeing Master Splinter inside chatting with the youngest one in the lair. It seemed that the conversation was about him, as both his brother and father immediately stopped talking after seeing him.

“Am I bargin’ in?” Raph asked.

“No, not at all, my son.” Splinter reassured, heading towards his dojo, but not before putting a hand on Raph’s shoulder, “I would like to talk with you after treating your wound, Raphael.”

Raph was skeptical, but kept on a straight face, “Sure, Sensei.”

As Master Splinter got outside, and Donnie started stitching Raph’s arm, Raph kept wondering about so many things. What was this feeling? What did it mean? Why was he so worried? Why was he expecting something bad will happen?

Well… Master Splinter sure can help him with this. He was always good with superstitious stuff.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Short, I know, forgive me. I just wanted to clear some things before writing the fighting part, and the next chapter is going to be a whole epic fight scene with no breaks, so be ready!


	3. Chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I said it before, I’ll say it again. I absolutely suck at writing fighting scenes. I don’t know, action isn’t really my favorite type of Genre, and I tend to repeat some words multiple times. But I also tried my best at this chapter, and I hope you enjoy it! :)  
> WARNING: Blood… lots of blood, sheer violence, deaths/death counts, dangerous weapons, crying and -hopefully- feels!  
> 

The preview image is by Mysterious-D on DeviantArt!

Michelangelo straightened his back and his chucks spun in the air, silently counting the scums left. ‘ _One down, six to go._ ’ He gave a yell in excitement.

Normally, he’d be afraid of the fact of being out numbered, but today was just a different story. He longed for kicking butt… for some reason. Maybe because he still had some steam left, he assumed.

The six thugs growled in hatred, deciding to avenge their fallen leader. Two thin gang members dashed to strike, one holding a base-ball bat and one wearing brass-knuckles. Mikey dodged downwards from the bat swing, giving a punch to the doer’s abdomen, causing him to scream and fall to the ground, groaning. The brass-knuckle clad tried to punch the youngest turtle, but Mikey avoided his strikes several times with ease. The freckled turtle soon had enough, and held out the thug’s hand in front of his face, giving a hideous smirk with his narrowed pupil-less eyes.

“Careful.” Mikey said simply.

The criminal gulped upon seeing this and before he knew it, a nun-chuck’s end made contact with his face, making him fall flat on the ground with his partner.

‘ _Four._ ’ Michelangelo counted in his mind.

Another two robbers sprinted to attack him, this time the two were quite muscular, and Mikey knew that it wouldn’t be as easy to take them out. The criminal with the axe attacked first, sending a hit straight to Michael’s face, but the said turtle acted fast, and dodged. He wasn’t completely at the safe side yet, because the thug started swinging his weapon near Mikey’s body, and it became harder to dodge as time went by. Unfortunately, it even became tougher when the other ruffian, who was holding hockey stick, joined in striking with his gang member.

Mikey gritted his teeth, rain sending frantic hits on his skin, struggling to keep himself in one piece. Suddenly, a hockey stick caught him off guard, and he yelped when it hit him hard on the side of his face. The orange-clad scowled as he fell to the asphalt, letting go of his chucks that slid on the ground. Holding his throbbing cheek, he quickly returned to his posture and stood up, trying to reach his weapons. With the bitter luck he had, a giant man grasped his neck and smashed him on the side of the building before he could go anywhere.

Mikey’s state switched to fear, his sky blue pupils returning as tiny orbs. He struggled for breath, striving to let the strong hand let go of his wind pipe. The thug was pretty strong, and smirked over the gasping figure under him.

While Mikey was in his helpless state, one of the criminals with a revolver took the chance and fired his gun, aiming at the turtle’s right side. Mikey screamed before he knew it, even though his neck was still being squeezed by his opponent’s hand.

Blood poured from the space between his shell and plastron, and Mikey was aching to stop the pain emerging from both his neck and side. The criminal above him smirked wickedly at the pathetic sight, sending a blow to same part where the hockey stick made contact, then finally freed his grasp.

The freckled terrapin bellowed, landing on his gunshot wound as he tasted blood in his mouth, and soon it poured down to stain the floor below him.

The four gang members laughed and high-fived, thinking that they had finally succeeded.

Mikey coughed weakly, opening his hazy eyes and lifting his heavy head so slightly, to find his beloved weapon right in front of him. He quickly and quietly grabbed them, trying not to draw too much attention from the still cheering thugs.

The Purple Dragons left kept on laughing and complimenting each other, until the hockey stick guy stopped with a gasp, and suddenly dropped out cold.

Freezing upon seeing this, the trio lifted their heads to behold the young terrapin spinning his chucks, and man did he seem pissed off.

“How the hell can he still stand up?!” The greatest criminal yelled in disbelief.

Mikey’s lips curled upwards, as he was indeed struggling to stay on his feet. “No need to explain to him, his few brain cells wouldn’t get it.” He taunted, addressing the rest of the gang.

The giant roughneck balled his fists, his vexation almost reaching its peak. Mikey, however, wasn’t patient enough to wait for them to attack. He yelled loudly, incoming for an onslaught with his dancing nun-chucks.

With a swing of an axe towards his noddle, Mikey rapidly pulled his head inside his shell, causing the Purple Dragon to accidently stab the gun holder next to him, who dropped lifelessly on the floor. While in his fears, the axe-man couldn’t comprehend what exactly happened as he was swiftly tripped by the turtle, and hit hard three times in the face before everything turned black.

Mikey tsked, ‘ _one._ ’ He counted just when he stood in front of the strongest robber, rain washing them both. Lightening lit the city for a minute before thunder roared like a wild animal.

The older guy hollered, grasping his dagger and sprinting towards the smallest mutant turtle, and the said turtle himself whitened his eyes and shouted, dashing with super-speed towards his opponent.

Mikey was the first to pound, sending his chucks flying towards the stealer’s head. His enemy quickly ducked, trying to stab the orange-banded before him, yet Mikey made a back-flip over his head, and landed behind the villain to whip him on the back four times. The dagger user yelped from the blows, falling on his knees.

Michelangelo stood for some seconds in order to catch his breath; because the only thing that was keeping him standing was, in fact, his adrenaline. The bullet wound was letting out awful amounts of blood, and the more he moved, the more his blood splashed out. His neck hurt from the choke earlier, and his head wasn’t any better. His skull probably cracked after those two strikes. Wow, it was probably a miracle that he was even standing at all.

Mikey was so out of it, focusing too much on his panting to hear the base-ball bat owner stand right behind him. A sudden blow on the same aching spot on his head took the orange-clad by great surprise, his sight turning pure white with agony. Instead of falling down this time, however, Mikey tried to balance himself as much as possible. He tottered multiple times back and forth until his shell met the same wall he broke earlier, puffing in exhaustion while his noddle poured down blood at last.

The huge criminal grinned to the awoken bat holder, thanking him for support. He then frowned deeply at the half conscious turtle, and started to approach him.

Mikey weakly lifted his head to eye his opponent, and the great thug caught his cheeks then simpered down at him. The smirk promptly shifted into a grimace, “I have a few brain cells, eh? Well, let your brain cells explain THIS!” He jabbed Mike’s poor left shoulder with so much force that the dagger penetrated Mikey’s body and got stuck in a crack in the wall, making it almost impossible to take out.

“YAAAAAAAAAAH!”

Michelangelo was on the verge of losing it; feeling pain, and only pain. Rain washed over him as he screeched, his eyes snapped shut while letting out aching tears. For a second he thought that his end was near, and he kept getting flashes of his brothers, father and April.

He remembered them, he remembered his childhood, he remembered their first day on patrol, he remembered the events that happened three days ago, he remembered every single unforgettable memory with his only friend and family…

…and most importantly, he remembered today.

The cruel words of his brothers echoed in his mind. How they bickered about him being a problem and a threat to their lives, and how none of them wanted to be with him.

More tears fell, getting mixed with the sweet water of rain, and suddenly he snapped back to reality. His eyes became vast upon beholding the bat that was about to strike his head for the fourth time in a row. Mikey veered his noddle in the hopes of not getting killed.

But what _really_ infuriated the youngest was that his nun-chucks were broken down on the floor, smashed into pieces.

The dagger owner quickly noticed that Mikey came round and shouted, “Be careful! This freak can go total nuts on you!”

Too bad the bat user was too slow at making sense of the sentence.

Mike immediately grabbed his Kusarigama and landed its sharp end into the guy’s head, causing him to fall limp on the floor without a second glance. Mikey didn’t even rest afterwards; and his eyes landed on the blood-coated revolver on the ground, dragged it near with his weapon and bounced it with his leg. The gun smoothly landed in Mikey’s hand, and the terrapin smirked as his pupils disappeared.

The giant gasped in horror, deciding to run for his life. Mikey couldn’t miss the chance…

“Say goodnight, dude.”

_BANG!!!_

…

And that was it.

Mikey’s arm fell limp, the gun slipping from his hand and contacting with the floor. The amount of blood he was seeing and smelling sent a wave of nausea that made him want to throw everything he ate up.

He attempted to fall on his knees, to at least rest, but the dagger stuck in his shoulder had different opinions. Every time Mikey moved the knife would pierce in a different spot inside, and a yelp would escape his throat. With shaky hands, Mikey caught the weapon, choosing to suppress the pain in order to break free. He pulled the end of the dagger with full force, groaning as blood splashed and rain hit him, sending his entire body into a cold shiver. He tried to pull it again; this time finally doing some progress and the weapon slightly moved.

Thunder crashed and Mikey whimpered, recalling how he cuddled with his brothers when they were young whenever he heard the sky growl. Mike’s eyes watered after remembering that, wishing that his brothers were with him right now. He regretted running away. He regretted yelling at them. He regretted ever being born.

Police sirens sounded, causing the youngest turtle to panic. He didn’t care about how much it pained him anymore, but rather about not being experimented on by some humans.

He snapped his eyes shut, and pulled as hard as he could. Luckily for him, the dagger finally obeyed, and Mikey was free. Without taking an interval to breathe, he grabbed his Kusarigama and fled between the alleys, searching for a manhole. Soon, he did, and instantly went inside.

As strange as it may sound, Mikey felt home, and finally gave himself a chance to rest. His adrenaline entirely died, and his shaky legs couldn’t hold him straight anymore. He fell to his knees, wide eyed, panting and gasping as if hyperventilating. Michelangelo caught his shoulder and groaned, his whole body wet with blood, rain and tears. The moment he grasped the fact that he was indeed alive sent a whole new feeling of both horror and satisfaction. He was petrified by all means, and that let him experience the most terrifying meltdown he had ever had. He coughed, he cried, he sniffed and screamed. He held nothing back.

The bloody dagger -now coated with salty tears- was still in his palms, and Mikey dug it deep in his belt, making the choice of keeping it as a reminder and a lesson of that horrible experience.

After some minutes, the young turtle finally settled down. He still couldn’t stand up, but he longed for home. He longed for his family. He wanted to hug them and cry in their plastrons. He needed warmth.

‘ _But do they even want you?_ ’ a voice in the back of his mind interjected. It was true that none of them came searching for him. ‘ _I have no other choice._ ’ He replied, ‘ _If they don’t want me anymore, I can pack my stuff and leave after treating myself._ ’

And with that, he braced himself and stood up, held the wall for support, and began walking.

The journey back home was hard, maybe at the difficulty of insane. His whole body was aching and begging him to sleep, but Mikey couldn’t have any of that. He just had to go to the subway tunnel and reach the lair, sounds like a piece of cake. But said is truly easier than done.

He thanked heaven that his legs were fine; at least not stabbed or had any major injuries; or else he’d be crawling right now. He wondered if his brothers were asking about him, let alone worried about him; and had no idea how they would react after seeing him. This was probably the second time he gets shell-shocked like that. Second place after Shredder’s fight.

Wow, that day was probably the start of this whole mess. No, no, that _man_ , in better words. Would it kill the Shredder to let go of the past? Would it harm him to forget or forgive Splinter? Did Tang Shen’s marriage really hurt his feelings like that? Then what would he do if his own wife died in front of him, his daughter was taken from him, and got mutated? Sure, that wouldn’t leave him any better. But what to say about something unchangeable?

Mikey grimaced as he entered the subway tunnel, feeling hazy and seeing mere dark spots in front of him.

‘ _Get it together, Mikey. Just a few more steps._ ’

He stopped for some seconds, panting as if he’d run for miles. His legs were slightly shaking beneath him, and his wounds were spitting out blood every now and then. He felt really heavy, and really unbalanced. If he gave up here, his brothers may never find him.

Letting go of the wall, Michelangelo leaned on it instead, in order to hold his bleeding shoulder. He hissed loudly, feeling pain and feeling numb at the same time.

He decided to continue, and his limbs had never been slower. His world was starting to spin before him, his breathing began to tire him, he was hearing nothing other than his loud gasps; the sounds of the trains passing by were just quiet hums to him…

He was tired, he was cold, it hurt _everywhere_ …

But things changed when he saw a dim white light that was too familiar for him.

Picking his pace, Mikey was barely smiling at the fact that he’d made it. That he’d made it home. He was back with his family. He was back with his Sensei.

And back with his brothers.

Michael’s happy feature abruptly turned into a sad state, ‘ _almost there…_ ’ he encouraged.

As soon as Mikey took a step in the lair, his legs failed him. He merely had a second to glance into his home, before making contact on the ground beneath him.

Screams, cries and shouts were the only things he heard before his world faded.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Man, I cried. I literally cried while writing this, especially at Mikey’s breakdown part.  
> I hope you liked the action wrap; I’m really glad it wasn’t that long. Every feedback would be appreciated, and I’ll try replying to every single one if I have the time. Love ya guys! :*


	4. Chapter 4

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I Can't thank you enough, readers! The feedbacks were great and I'm glad that people are getting hyped for it! Here's chapter 4 as a reward! :D It really isn't my favorite chapter here, but I hope you enjoy it nonetheless!
> 
> Fanart in the middle of the chapter is by Mizu-Inu on DeviantArt! ^^

Master Splinter stood in front of the laboratory, waiting for Donatello to finish greeting it. As Donnie settled after some time, Hamato entered the lab with his son, causing the second youngest to stop and turn around to look up at him, confused,

"You need me with something, Master Splinter?"

The old rat caressed his long beard while shutting his eyes, "Yes, Donatello. I want to ask you about what happened between Raphael and Michelangelo." Splinter knew that he should ask the purple-clad first, as he was the most rational one and would give everything in detail.

Donnie lowered his head slightly, heading to sit down in front of his computer and offer his father a similar chair. "Okay, so Leo separated us into two: Me with him, and Raph with Mikey; in order for us to catch a van, and Raph and Mikey help a cornered woman from some Purple Dragons."

Splinter nodded.

Donnie paused for some time, "From what I know, Mikey somehow lost focus while they were fighting, and that made a member of that gang stab Raph."

"And that caused Raphael to lash out on him." Splinter concluded.

The purple-clad nodded, "At least I think so, because Mikey looked so upset when they found us. Raph kept complaining about Mikey's 'irresponsibility' and that he wouldn't get paired with him again…"

"Did Michelangelo have the chance to defend himself?" Yoshi asked.

The youngest in the lair paused, looking back at the incident, "N-Now that I think about it, no, he didn't. He tried to speak multiple times, but every time he talked, Raph would cut his sentence."

Splinter hummed in thought…

" _Oh, yeah? Then why don't you go after him, Raph? Oh, right, you were the one who sent him off in the first place!"_ Leo's voice reached the lab, and Splinter frowned.

"Looks like your brothers are fighting again…" Splinter said.

"You mean _bickering_ again." Don said in annoyance.

Yoshi tried to ignore his sons' voices in the meantime, "So, is that why Michelangelo ran off?"

Donnie shook his head with a kind of a sad sigh, "No. He ran off because… we kept saying that we don't want him…"

For the first time in this conversation, Splinter showed confusion. He raised an eyebrow, not seeing this sentence coming out of his son's mouth. He expected something more… trivial to be the problem; but this sounded serious.

"Why did you all say that, Donatello?"

Donnie lowered his glance, "I kinda feel bad now for doing that and not standing up for him. It's just that… since our first patrol topside, Mikey was becoming harder to bear. He messed around a lot and didn't take anything seriously. You know that he's the reason why we fought the Shredder at all?"

Splinter sighed, nodding. He was about to open his mouth and speak until Donnie continued, "Raph said that he didn't want to be paired with Mikey again and that he should be with me. I complained, then Leo complained, then shell broke loose."

"What did Michelangelo say about all of this?" Splinter interrogated.

Donnie once again paused, realization dawning over him, "He didn't say anything. None of us even looked at him or tried to talk to him-"

Don stopped upon seeing Raph enter the lab, "Am I bargin' in?" the second-oldest asked.

"Not at all, my son." Splinter got his cane and stood up. Meanwhile, Donnie was looking for the first aid-kit under the computer's counter. He wondered how he missed such simple stuff, like how Mikey never even had the chance to talk. He sighed, making sure to call Mikey's T-phone right after fixing Raph.

**TMNT**

"Raph, I don't mind if you say that it hurts."

"For the millionth time, Donnie, I'm fine!"

Donnie sighed somewhere between sorrow and exhaustion. The silence his brother was emerging while being stitched was really worrying the genius brother. It was a rare occasion for Raphael to be that quiet; and even though he always complained about Mikey being too talkative, he himself wasn't any different.

But that wasn't the point, though. Raph's quietness was, in fact, not the only thing that was worrying Donatello. It was the sad face his brother wore. This concerned expression. It was really out of character for the hot head himself to have that countenance. Too out of character.

Donnie wished to let his brother speak about anything. About Mikey, about his feelings… heck, even if he let out his fury at him Donnie would be okay with that. He needed to cover a lot of things with his brother, and most importantly, know what he thinks about Mikey's matter. Was he okay about Mikey running off like that? Wasn't he feeling guilty at all about the situation?

A lot of questions followed, and Donnie was getting distracted into his own thought, until a hiss sounded from his older turtle. Donnie snapped his head to look at the arm between his hands, and noticed that he was tightening the bandage –that he couldn't even remember he'd brought in the first place- too much on the tender stitches. Donatello freaked out,

"S-sorry!" as he began to unwrap them.

Raph didn't reply, as if nothing happened, and the purple-banded frowned. This was really getting irritating.

And it didn't even take the genius long to confess that,

"Oh, okay! That's it! What is wrong with you?!" He interrogated, his voice slightly loud.

Raph nearly jumped at the prompt question, as he was completely out of focus before the sudden outburst. The red-clad studied his brother's expression, finding some worry in it, and a heck lot of anger.

"Nothing, Donnie! I'm fine!" Raph answered in a matter of irritation.

"And you'd be crazy if you think I'm gonna believe that!" The purple huffed, earning a look from Raph that didn't really affect the younger, "You're not uttering a single word! The Raph I know keeps complaining about what is bothering him until everyone knew what bothered him."

Frowning, the emerald-eyed turned his head away from his brother, trying to deny his words in his mind. Unfortunately, he was truly right, when wasn't Donnie? So, Raph let out a deep sigh in frustration, trying to come up with an excuse for his actions,

"Well… maybe I'm _not_ bothered by anything!" He argued.

Donatello's mask shifted as if he was raising an eyebrow, a pained look suddenly made its way on his face, "Not… bothered?" he asked in a mere whisper.

"I'm not the one who nearly made us fall out of the rooftop. I'm not the one who lost focus and let my brother get stabbed. I'm not the one who ran away like an idiot. So why would _I_ be bothered?" Raph scoffed, ruing every single word coming out of his mouth. He knew that whatever he was saying wasn't true, but he just wanted to prove his point for Donnie.

He wouldn't feel weak, not in front of his younger brother.

"OF COURSE YOU SHOULD BE BOTHERED!" The sudden shout caught Raph off guard, and he eyed his brother. The red-clad's orbs widened as he noticed the tears collected in the brown eyes of Donnie, and the angry expression his usual cool brother wore. Raph couldn't even say anything before the second youngest lashed out again, " _I'm_ feeling bad because I said those horrible things about Mikey before even letting him speak! And you, here, just thinking that everything is fine and that nothing is your fault?! You really DON'T CARE about him, do you?!"

Raph's breath hitched at the last sentence, seeing the tears trail his brother's furious face. The words died in his throat and it felt like his voice box was taken away from him. Was it true? Was it that obvious? How did it even come to this? How would he justify himself against _Donnie_? How would he forgive himself for making his younger brother cry?

Donnie's frown faded as his tears trickled down. He was quiet; not sobbing, not emitting a sound, but just letting out his emotions. "I-I at least thought that y-you'd feel worried about him, or just guilty for w-what you said. I-I never thought that you wouldn't-"

Raph finally snapped out of his shocked state to finally cut Donnie off, "ARE YOU CRAZY, DONNIE?! OF COURSE I CARE!"

Donnie's eyes went vast as he looked up at his brother.

"I care about him more than I care about myself! I worry about you guys before worrying about me! Do you really think I'm that much of a jerk to not feel anything about what happened?!"

Donnie was about to nod until Raph continued, "I _am_ worried, Donnie! And that's why I'm acting like this! Something in me is telling me that not everything is fine. I just didn't want to worry you, that's all." Raph finally finished, looking hard at the youngest in the lair.

He was having slight doubts about this, Donnie's not gonna lie, but it seemed that Raph was actually saying the truth, "Y-you mean that you're not angry at Mikey anymore?"

Raph paused at the question, "Of course I'm still mad at that dweeb." He answered in a playful tone, "And he's gonna have it when he returns. Just wait and see." He grinned.

Donnie grinned back, wiped the tears off his face and continued wrapping the bandages around his older brother's arm. "So, what did you say about feeling worried?" he asked.

Raph flinched slightly, and took a while before answering, "I-I don't know. It's like that bad feeling in my gut…" he paused, "It's weird, actually. I never felt like this before…"

The second youngest hummed in thought as he wrapped the last wrap, "I'm not a philosopher, but I'd say that you _really_ want to say sorry to Mikey…" The purple-clad snickered slightly as he said in an obvious tone.

"Har-har." Raph rolled his eyes, "It's not that important, anyway. Maybe it'll fade after some time…"

"Aaaand done!" Donnie announced after putting on the safety pin.

Raph rubbed his arm, "Well, thanks, D! I owe ya this one."

A roll of an eye came out from Donnie, "As if I take any payment…" he grinned.

Raph smirked back, and after another quick thank you, he decided to head to the dojo, where his father was waiting for him.

**TMNT**

"So, my son, I see that you did not avoid the meeting like I had expected." Sensei said without opening his eyes, sensing Raphael as he sat down on his legs in front of him.

' _Geez, how can he do that?_ ' Raph questioned as his father was still closing his eyes. He took a deep breath and exhaled to calm himself down, waiting for his father to speak.

After some time, Splinter lifted his eyelids with a soft smile, "You know, Raphael? You've been acting quite funny since you got here."

Raph rose an eyebrow, not sure where this is going, "What do you mean, Sensei?"

A small frown crossed the old-rat's face, "For instant, you argued with Leonardo about him being 'irresponsible' for not going after Michelangelo, even though you are mad about him…"

The hot-head's confused feature faded. Third time one his family members notice his contradictory, how ironic. Wrapping his mind around the sentence, he tried to come up with an answer before Splinter realizes that he was actually right.

Splinter sighed after he received no quick reply from the terrapin, "Raphael, my son, do you really think that it was Michelangelo's intention to get you hurt?" He asked, eyeing Raph's injured arm.

Raphael took a moment to process the question, then shook his head, "No, Sensei. But I wasn't mad because I got hurt because of him." He stated firmly, "I was just fed up with Mikey always being the reason we fail our missions!"

Splinter hummed, "So, you don't want Michelangelo to accompany you in missions anymore…" he stated in a conclusive tone, wanting to see his son's reaction.

Raph's head perked up as he didn't see this coming; words coming out of his mouth faster than he'd intended to: "What? NO!" He quickly realized his outburst and backed off, "I-I mean, I _am_ mad, but that doesn't mean that I don't want him with us. He just needs a little push to take everything seriously, that's all…"

Hamato closed his eyes, starting to caress his long beard, "He doesn't need it, my son, because he had already realized that…"

Raphael's eyes widened slightly, "Wait, what?"

The elder sighed, "Right after being treated from the Shredder's encounter, Michelangelo came to me in the middle of the night, and started crying…"

Raph's eyes went vast as his stomach twisted, "What?!" This time, it was a shout in disbelief.

Splinter nodded, "He kept saying that he was useless, and that he had failed you all…" The rat frowned at the memory, "I tried to tell him otherwise, but he was determined to take the blame on his shoulder, and kept telling me that he was the reason why April is so upset now and he was the reason Leonardo almost got killed…"

Raph couldn't register what he was hearing, "B-but, he wasn't-"

"He is affected by that experience more than you can imagine, Raphael," Splinter opened his eyes to reveal a sad gaze, "And most importantly, he is affected by what you all kept saying about him that day."

The hot head stared at the rug he was sitting at, trying to look back at the incidents, and a single sentence he recalled was enough to make him shudder,

" _And that's why no one wants to be with you!"_

His emerald pupils shrank, now awareness dawning over him. How could he even say that? To make his youngest brother, who was the only one who looked up to him –both literally and figuratively-, have a breakdown? He never even considered his words and how much they had a great trouble upon his family. And if he said that sentence, then he might as well have said much worse to any of his brothers.

And maybe that's why Donnie got so upset earlier. He thought that Raph didn't care about what he said or did. He thought that Raph never felt guilty or regretted his words in general.

Unfortunately, his thoughts were true.

Raph never looked back on a situation and persuaded himself that he was to blame. Whether he started the problem or not, he never considered himself at fault. He always learns the hard way. And that's a big problem.

A really big problem.

It was affecting the family; it was affecting his brothers; in a very negative way. Had he ever thought about how Mikey and Donnie felt while he and Leo fought? No. Had he ever wanted to find out the reason behind their frequent fights? No. Had he ever tried to talk to Leo and make out their differences? No!

He was only good at shutting himself in his room, or blaming anyone but himself for anything.

The second oldest terrapin started shaking slightly, rare feelings taking over him. His head started spinning as the truth hit him. He wasn't the best. He wasn't protecting them. He wasn't the turtle that a one could look up to.

He was a terrible brother.

Splinter shut his eyes, not amused at all by his son's silence. And despite Mikey telling him several times to keep his meltdown that day as a secret, Splinter couldn't anymore. His brothers, and _mostly_ the red-banded, needed to know that Michelangelo wasn't a joke and never intended to get them in danger. Yes, he could act childish. Yes, he could make mistakes. But there is more to Michelangelo than meets the eye.

"He was determined not to let you all down again," Splinter said softly, "And kept coming to me very early in the morning in hopes to be stronger and train harder." He paused, "Unfortunately, it did not take long before it took a great toll on your brother…"

Another new information. Maybe that's why Mikey was allowed to sleep for more intervals than any of them. The three brothers never knew why, and always complained when their teacher refused to wake the youngest up just like them. He was always late; even one time he was late for thirty minutes and received no punishment, and that always pissed the other three off. Donnie even tried to come up with theories for that, but as far as Raph could remember, none of the theories involved Mikey getting up pretty early to train. It was really hard for them to believe; and if these words weren't coming from his father's mouth, Raph too would have never believed that…

W-Wow… now that Raph thought about it, they really underestimated Mikey. He felt remorseful for the way he treated his baby brother, especially after he knew the truth. It made more sense why Mikey became quieter, and wasn't as energetic as he used to be. He was exhausted, he was tense, and none of them bothered to asked him about it, which made Raph feel even worse.

"I-I…" Raph stuttered, finally uttering something, "I… don't know what to say, Sensei…" he whispered in some shame.

Yoshi hummed with a sigh, "You do not need to say anything, Raphael. What really matters, here, is that you know your baby brother's true worth…"

"Hai…" Raphael looked up to his father, "I'm sorry…"

Splinter opened his eyes, "And I am sorry too, my son." The rat received a surprised look from the turtle, "I was too hard on you and your brothers these past three days, and I believe this had a major role in causing such plight…"

Raph kept quiet as he saw his father's guilty form. A rare scene for him to witness, really.

"Nevertheless," Splinter continued as his tone returned stern once again, "Your apology is accepted, Raphael. But I believe that you shall save it for someone else."

Raph inwardly cringed, staying silent for some minutes, until something hit him: the reason why he came in the first place…

"Hey, Sensei?"

"Hm?"

"I… I don't know how to say this, but I have that weird feeling. It's like I'm worried, but I don't know what I'm worried about. And I never even had that feeling before… I don't know…"

Raph lifted his head to eye his father, to be taken aback by Splinter's sudden tension. But it lasted for a brief second before Splinter calmed down,

"It's probably nothing." Splinter said as if he was persuading himself.

Raph cocked an eyebrow. ' _Since when was anything 'nothing' to Splinter?_ ' He thought.

"You are dismissed, my son." The old rat announced.

Raph was hesitant for some time, before he finally obeyed, skeptically walking out of the dojo, shutting the door behind.

As the door shut, Splinter let out a relieved sigh, putting a paw on his forehead…

"We need to find Michelangelo, and fast…"

**TMNT**

It had nearly been thirty minutes, and there was this creeping tension in the lair. It wasn't silent, though, but it was as if there was a freaky possessive demon running around.

Sometime after Raph had left the dojo, Donnie started to have those same worries too, and soon, Leo followed. None of them until now knew about the other's feelings. But the whole mess started when Raph came hurrying to the laboratory, pushing the door open, and shouting,

"DONNIE, WE HAVE TO FIND MIKEY!"

Donnie didn't jump, and didn't complain, but, oddly enough, joined Raph in freaking out, "I KNOW! I'VE BEEN TRYING TO CONTACT HIS T-PHONE, AND IT'S OUT OF SERVICE!"

"Guys, what's going on?!" Leo came dashing towards the lab, trying to keep his voice down even though he wasn't any better.

"WE MUST FIND MIKEY!" The other two shouted simultaneously.

"YOU'RE FEELING THAT TOO?!" Leo yelled.

"Oh my God! It's like a freaky connective instinct of some kind…" The genius turtle tried to keep himself balanced.

Raph grunted in annoyance, "I DON'T CARE WHAT THIS IS! WE HAVE TO FIND MIKEY, NOW!"

"Donnie, did you try to track down his phone?" Leo asked demandingly, getting serious.

"I did, and it's out of service!" Donatello started pacing back and forth, trying and failing to keep himself calm, "I can't believe Mikey's still out there! Have you heard the news? It's been pelting down since we got here, and no way could Mikey stay in the rain for long, especially that he's literally afraid of thunder!"

"Then what are we waiting for?!" Leonardo announced, "We go look for him immediat-"

_THUD_

The three turtles' hearts skipped a beat, all silencing at the sudden sound they heard. In a blink of an eye, they all drew their weapons, ready to attack whoever broke into their lair. And whoever they were, they chose their worst timing to do so, since the elder terrapins were not planning on wasting any time. They were agitated, they were concerned, they were unsettled, troubled.

Yells escaped their throats while rushing out of Donnie's lab, Raph ahead of the trio. Suddenly, and without a warning, the second oldest came into a halt, causing the others to bump into him before registering what was going on.

And when they did so, their weapons dropped free from their hands, clanking on the floor beneath them.

There, in the wide opening, was their baby brother, on the floor, bloody, and un-moving.

Their pupils were as tiny as a grain of dust, and their eyes were as wide as dinner plates. It was as if their whole system shut down for a brief moment, because they were barely keeping themselves straight up. W-Was this real? Or was it an illusion? What if they were just dreaming? What if it was just a nightmare?

These were the questions they were asking themselves, before Raphael finally noticed the sad truth that this was, in fact, not a dream, and just harsh reality slapping them all on the face.

And he cried.

They all did.

" _ **MIKEY!**_ " Raph was the first to shout this, suddenly, unfamiliar word. He bolted towards the small figure, got on his knees and cradled him in his arms, studying his face carefully as if looking at him for the first time,

"Mikey! Mikey, speak to me! Mikey…" Damn it, he couldn't stop crying. Tears trickled down and hit the limp body beneath him, as Leo and Donnie joined and got to their knees as well. Donnie was bawling just like Raph, while Leo was trying his best to contain himself for the sake of his brothers.

"Mikey, _please_ , don't do this to us…" Raph wailed while sobbing, unable to ease his shaking as he examined his freezing brother in his arms, and almost gagged as he saw the ugly gashes and injuries he had. The left side of his head was a complete red, his side had an obvious bullet wound that was turning into a terrifying shade of dark red, while his shoulder…

Damn, his shoulder.

It was only enough to let Raphael shudder horrifically, not even wanting to know what had caused his joint to swell up so badly like that. Raph's eyes kept trailing everywhere Michelangelo's body, inhaling shakily upon hearing his brother's heavy panting. He tightened his hold when Mikey suddenly coughed weakly, but still didn't wake up.

He almost forgot that his other brothers were right beside him as he held Mikey's head and got him closer to his plastron, hugged him tightly while tears made more than just a way out.

"I'm sorry…" He whispered so faintly, even he wasn't sure if he'd said anything or not. Blood wet his own chest and he couldn't care less.

Donnie suddenly snapped out of his trance, and frowned. What in the world was he doing? His brother was practically on the death bed and he hadn't done anything more than just pathetically cry for him to wake up. If wants to grant his and his brothers' wishes, he should shove all these feelings away right now and focus!

As he was still letting out unwanted tears, the genius got into his doctor mode. He forced his eyes to focus, and touched Mikey's skin to gasp, "He's completely soaked!"

Raph's breaths suddenly turned into growls, and his emotions boiled with fury, "I'M GONNA FUCKING _KILL_ WHOEVER DID THIS!" He yelled, tightening his hold a bit too much.

Leo didn't even bother to point Raph's usage of words, as he too was thinking the same. "Donnie, we have to-"

"No, _I_ have to!" Donnie quickly freed Mikey from Raph's grasp, carried him and ran towards his lab. Raph and Leo soon were right next to him. Mikey seemed so fragile in Donnie's arms, and Raph was both wide-eyed and in fear of what might happen. This was the second time he was this scared for his baby brother. First time was when a literal two-ton sign fell on him three days ago.

"Master Splinter!" Donnie called as loud as he could, "Master Splinter, we have a situation here!" He shouted, trying to keep his voice from breaking.

As Donnie and the others arrived to his lab, a.k.a. infirmary, they all heard heavy footsteps sounding closer to them. The rat entered while panting, and when he saw the figure laying in the medical-bed, his fur almost turned white.

Aside from the fact that the elder sons were already sobbing, his expectations were true as his eyes met the un-moving young terrapin.

"I need you two to get out of here," Donnie said as calmly as he could manage, addressing Leo and Raph.

"What?! No way! I'm staying here helping you!" Raph retorted.

"Raph, please…" Donnie pleaded in a broken tone, turning his head away and biting his lip in order to hold back the tears that were still threatening to fall.

The hot-head was about to protest again, until a hand held his shoulder. Raph flipped his head to see Leo shaking his head as if saying 'just listen to him'. And after some moments of silence between the three, the stubborn turtle regretfully obeyed.

Raphael's form shook and he started to sob again once he and Leo got out of the lab. Leo was debating himself at first, but decided to embrace Raph and pulled him into a hug. Raph neither complained, nor pushed his older brother away, but kept crying as he too wrapped his arms around Leo.

"I never wanted this to happen!" Raph shed tears that wet the other's shoulder.

"I-I know…" Leo stuttered, trying so hard to keep his voice contained and tough, "But Mikey needs us right now, and w-we're not giving up on him…"

Raph nodded as he continued to snivel in a much calmer way, and Leo was struggling to keep his own noises silent. This wasn't supposed to happen. This wasn't right.

And it sure was going to be a long night…

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I hate this chapter… why? I don't know. I feel like I couldn't really stick to the turtles' characters, and the parts that are supposed to be packed up with emotions feel so bland… I'm not sure, it's just my opinion. What do you think?
> 
> Forgive me for not giving Leo any justice in this chap. Next chapter will serve him well, I promise! :D


	5. Chapter 5

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Happy first of Ramadan, brothers and sisters! ^^ First day of fasting can be a bit tiring, but it’s a great time for us Muslims! It brings this fuzzy warm mood, and for the first time, I’m joyful while posting a chapter! XD Hope you enjoy it! <3

_Tick… Tock…_

_Tick… Tock…_

_Tick… Tock…_

This steady rhythm has been going on for quite a long time. It was supposed to be relaxing, de-stressing, putting them down and putting them at ease…

But unfortunately, it was none of that.

The air in the lair was suffocating, the tension in their hearts was aching. They wanted to know what was happening. They wanted to know what had happened.

It had been two hours…

Two. Freaking. Hours.

No sign, no information, no explanation.

And that only worried them.

…

Raphael grunted harshly, throwing the remote on the floor as if it disappointed him. He was really trying to distract himself, but nothing helped. At least it couldn’t be helped with Leo pacing back and forth in front of the laboratory door.

The red-banded sighed upon looking back at his brother for the hundredth time, attempting to come up with something to talk about, but what could he possibly say? He too was worried; he too was confused. If they talked about their baby brother’s deal, they might jump into unnecessary conclusions. They might assume some wrong things; which isn’t the best thing to do right now.

Wow, all that quietness made him start to think like Donnie…

Raph turned around again in order to glance at the eldest sibling, to find him stepping in and raising a fist to knock on the door-

“Don’t do it, Leo.” The hot head calmly yet warningly said, stopping Leo in the last second.

Leonardo sighed, dropped his hand and closed his eyes. He couldn’t settle down a bit. With the lair being so silent, he could have meditated and thought this through and through; problem is, it was surprisingly hard. He hadn’t tried meditating yet, but he just knew that he wouldn’t relax.

It was really frustrating, for both him and his brother.

“I-I…” Leo tried to find a proper answer, “I’m… really worried…” He said slowly with a wince.

Raph’s eyes dropped to the floor, knowing fully that if Leo had knocked again, Donnie might lose it. The genius had already shouted several times from inside the infirmary, and by the sounds of it, he was pretty stressed. It was indeed a lot to handle, and both Raph and Leo wanted to help, but the purple-clad refused several times, always yelling things like: “Not now” or “Please leave me alone” or even “I’m working here”

Raphael was determined to go and look for whoever did that to his brother, to give them a piece of his mind. But of course, mighty Leo stopped him before doing anything rash. To be honest, Raph was half glad that Leo pressed him not to, and also half shocked about what he said…

_“I’m going out after finishing this…” Raph suddenly announced as he was washing the blood off his plastron in the bathroom, with Leo just beside him, doing the same._

_Leo stopped rubbing his own, readying himself for an upcoming argument, “Don’t, Raph…” he ordered calmly._

_Raph grimaced, “You don’t know what I’m planning to do.”_

_“Yes, I do.” Leo frowned, still not eying his brother, “You want to go searching for whoever did that to Mikey. Well, guess what? This is a bad idea.”_

_“Yeah, and why?” Raph scoffed, “You just want me and let the maniac who nearly killed my brother just run around in the city?!” His voice was becoming loud._

_Leo met him in the eye, “Going around in circles to search for someone won’t do us any good!”_

_“And staying here won’t, either!”_

_“Who knows who did that?!” Leo’s voice was becoming loud as well, “What if it was a Purple Dragon? What if it was a Foot ninja? Heck, what if it was **The Shredder**?!” He began to draw closer to Raph._

_“I DON’T CARE!” Raph yelled as he yanked his arm for emphasis, “My baby brother is **dying**! I can’t just do nothing about it!”_

_“At least we’re here if Donnie needs something!”_

_“Donnie’s been yelling in our faces every time we knock on the door!”_

_“So we wait for him until he doesn’t!”_

_“You can help him on your own! I don’t get what your problem is!”_

_“My problem is you going out there **alone**!”_

_“I go out on my own most of the time!”_

_“You won’t this time!”_

_“What’s the difference-”_

_“There is no difference!”_

_“Then why-”_

_“Because you won’t!”_

_“The shell, Leo-”_

_“BECAUSE I DON’T WANT TO LOSE YOU TOO!”_

_Silence engulfed both turtles, one was staring at his brother with wide eyes, while the other was panting with tears collected in his eyes. After studying Raph’s expression, Leo seemed to realize what he said, and his fists uncurled as he stepped back._

_“Wh-What are you saying, L-” Raph tried to utter something._

_“Do what you want, Raph…” Leo took his sponge and was heading out of the bathroom, but Raph sprinted to catch his shoulder and spun him, to be surprised that salty water was trickling down his face._

_Raph kept silent for some moments, watching his brother cry for the first time in many years. Leo himself was trying so hard to glance away, but his eyes couldn’t help but land on Raph’s eyes. Raph knew how it felt to be caught while crying, and it wasn’t all that pretty, to be honest. So, instead of questioning it, Raph tried to lift the tension off, and smirked,_

_“My job here is to disobey you, Fearless, and I’m gonna do just that…”_

_It was clear that Leo wasn’t seeing this coming at all; Nonetheless, he wiped his eyes quickly, and smirked back._

They hadn’t pretty much talked after that. Raph would only look at Leo to see how he’s doing, and then return back to the TV to change channels.

The red-clad wouldn’t say that the moment caught him off guard, but rather worried him. It showed how much Leo carried on his shoulders, and if Raph were in his place, he wasn’t sure if he was going to handle all of this without freaking out.

And perhaps that’s why Leo was chosen to handle leadership. Raph was probably too stubborn to admit it, but he would actually be a bad friggin’ leader. He wouldn’t control his emotions, unlike Leo. If someone got hurt, he would panic rather than giving orders to get them to safety. His brother was more cool and collected, characteristics Raph never had.

It was weird how Raph was thinking right now. He never thought that the day when he admits these things would come. It could be that worry and pressure that was dawning over him, because since washing his brother’s blood, he was doing nothing but sitting on this stair-step, waiting. It made his chest tighten in a way, since not being informed about anything was leaving him in a world of possibilities. He was sure it had the same effect on Leo. They wouldn’t hear anything if –by chance- the heart monitor’s line flattened, simply because the laboratory was sound proof. It needed an explosion or at least Donnie’s loudest voice to reach the other end.

Splinter had gotten out of the lab in the first 30 minutes of their wait, but explained nothing to the elders who jumped onto him as soon as he shut the door behind him. He said that Donnie will say everything once he is out, and that they should leave him alone for the meantime. The way their Sensei said it didn’t leave them any better, because the rare tone of sorrow was too much for them to take in. When Yoshi informed them, he instantly left them and headed to the dojo.

And, of course, Leo didn’t follow him.

“Me too, Leo…” Raph said while letting out a breath, “me too…” he repeated, returning his head to look at the non-working TV.

Leo’s eyes shifted multiple times hesitantly, then finally gave up. He decided to sit beside his brother on the sitting area; his legs got tired, anyway.

Once he got swollen by the cushions and got comfortable, he glanced over his brother awkwardly, who was tapping his fingers and pattering his leg up and down, seeming so lost in his thoughts.

Leo cleared his throat softly, trying to think of something to talk to the red-clad about. They both needed to kill some time because they had nothing better to do. So, after some minutes of silence, Leo finally came up with something,

“Pretty quiet, huh?” He smiled half-heartedly, facing the dark television.

Raph snapped out of his thoughts to look at the blue-clad with some surprise, before he too smiled sadly, “Yeah…” he answered softly.

It was quiet for some minutes, until Leo muttered, “Hey, sorry about yelling in the bathroo-”

A raised hand made him stop, “No, Leo, don’t apologize…” Raph was thinking about saying more, but it all came out as a sigh, and he drifted his eyes to the opposite corner of the lair.

Leo’s mask shifted as if he was raising an eyebrow, questioning, “What’s wrong, Raph?”

Raphael’s feature changed as he frowned, “What _isn’t_ wrong, Leo?” he stated quietly but angrily, “Mikey was covered in who knows whose blood from head to toe, and you expect me to just be okay with that?!”

Leo backed away, “A-alright! Relax. I-I’m sorry…” He stuttered, holding up his three-fingered hands.

The blue-clad waited for some seconds, before he sighed and decided to leave his brother alone. He figured that Raph wasn’t really pleased with his presence right now.

But, much to his surprise, a hand caught his before he could step away. Flipping his head around, Leo found his immediate younger brother facing away, yet ordering him,

“Stay…”

The oldest paused before returning back to his position. He was kind of grateful that his brother did that, to be honest, but he decided to hide that fact in the sake of not being punched.

“Look, Leo, I’m sorry, okay?” Raph said in a low tone, finally eying his brother, “This is all my fault and I know it! If I hadn’t yelled at Mikey, none of this would’ve happened! I’m such an idiot!” He finished, guilt eating him alive.

“Hey, hey…” Leo hushed, scooping his brother in a side hug, “This wasn’t only your fault. I should’ve been more responsible. I should’ve taken care of him like the leader I’m supposed to be! At least… like the older brother I’m supposed to be…”

“Don’t say that, Leo!” Raph suddenly yelled, breaking the hug, “I know I’ve never admitted that before, but you really _are_ the best one to lead this team!” Leo’s eyes widened in surprise as his brother continued, “Who knows what shell might happen if _I_ was the leader?! Anyone of you could get killed!” Raph’s enraged state settled, his shoulders dropping as he muttered, “I’ve messed up countless times to prove that already…”

Leo was in loss of words. This _was_ the first time his brother opened up about his true feelings like this. His true feelings about himself, and about him. The leader never considered that Raph was looking so down at himself. They never even gave each other a chance to talk at all since the Shredder’s fight, which was three days ago. The fight, that, may or may not be the reason behind everything.

“No, Raph, no!” Leo shouted, earning a shocked stare, “Just… no…”

Silence lingered for some time, before Raph readjusted himself to wrap an arm behind his brother’s neck, and rest his head on Leo’s…

“Really feels like I’ve missed you, bro…” Raph suddenly stated from nowhere.

Leo flinched slightly before smiling, “Was gonna say the same thing.” He paused as his smile dropped, “Have you ever wondered what was going on between us two?”

Raph nodded weakly, staring at nothing in particular, “Today…”

Leonardo sighed, “We were really fighting over dumb things, weren’t we?”

He received another nod, “Mmhm.”

“And… we really mistreated Donnie and Mikey when they tried to stop us…” Leo drifted in his own thoughts as he spoke.

Raph’s eyes widened slightly, remembering that particular time when Mikey tried to settle an argument, and Raph was about to punch him if it wasn’t for Donnie. Then, he remembered those other times, when he was always saying those really harsh words to his baby brother…

_“Guys, please, just stop!” Mikey yelled, tears forming in the corner of his eyes._

_Neither Raph or Leo were paying the least attention to him, as they drew their weapons, ready to attack one other._

_“YOU REALLY THINK YOU’RE STRONGER THAN ME, FEARLESS?!” Raph shrieked in pure anger._

_“I **AM** STRONGER, AND I CAN EASILY PROVE IT TO YOU!” Leo yelled._

_“Leo, Raph, please! Listen to me!” Mikey tried._

_The elders dashed to strike each other, but were abruptly interrupted by Mikey, who ran in between both of them and used his Kusarigama_ _to grab both pairs of weapons in an unbelievable speed._

_Raph and Leo hit each other’s foreheads and groaned as they landed on the ground. The red-clad was first to recover as he lashed out,_

_“MIKEY, WHAT THE **FUCK**?!”_

_“I’M NOT LETTING YOU TWO FIGHT!!” Mikey yelled both angrily and sadly._

_“You really **are** eager to be a pain in my ass, aren’t you?” He hissed as pushed Mikey’s shoulder roughly, snatching his twin Sais._

_“Language, Raph!” Leo scolded._

_“What’s going on?!” Donnie asked while approaching._

_Mikey gave the Katanas to Leo, suppressing his tears as much as he could, “Nothing, Donnie…” And he walked away._

_“Cry baby…” Raph scoffed._

_“Now what is **wrong** with you?” Leo bickered._

_And they continued at it all night long…_

Raph never checked on Mikey that night, and never wondered if he was doing okay or not. Who knows what had happened later with his baby brother? He wouldn’t blame him if he had a breakdown, or at least cried. His words were too cruel, and admittedly, he said similar words to Mikey every time he tried to barge in while he and Leo fought.

Which was a lot.

“O-Oh, man…” Raph absentmindedly muttered, forgetting that Leo was still beneath him.

The blue-eyed glanced upwards but didn’t move, “I know…”

Raph closed his eyes. This was a lot to take in in one day. First, that weird feeling took over him; then, Splinter told him about Mikey’s constant trainings every day; then…

The terrapin didn’t finish listing, pausing when he remembered his Sensei’s words. He opened his eyes and tightened his hold a little bit, asking,

“Hey, Leo?”

“Hm?”

“Do… Do you know that Mikey lost it the night we fought Shred-head?”

This was met by a sudden head shot, and a pair of shocked blue eyes staring at him, “W-What?!”

Raph was silent for a moment, hardly believing that Splinter didn’t say a thing to his oldest son. He expected Leo to be already informed, but by the looks of it, Raph was the first one to actually know about this. Which was surprising.

“What do you mean, Raph? Did he come to your room that night?!” Leo asked in a loud voice.

“No. He didn’t go to _my_ room. He went to _Splinter’s_ , actually.” Raph let it out in a hushed intonation, “Sensei told me that today. He said that Mikey came to his room that night, crying and saying that none of us wanted him…” His voice was becoming lower as he spoke, “And since then, Mike would train with Splinter until the break of dawn, then go to sleep to wake up again and train with all of us…”

Raph finished and glimpsed at his brother, who had a complete blank face. He opened his mouth and closed it several times, trying to find the right words to reply to what he’d just heard. If this was coming from his dad’s mouth, then Leo had no doubt that it was true. Although Leo couldn’t register the fact that his goofy, cheerful, non-caring baby brother would have more training sessions than him.

Then it hit him.

His baby brother was no longer goofy, no longer cheerful, no longer non-caring.

In fact, it had been three days since he saw a single smile on Michelangelo’s face.

Leo’s expression gloomed over the harsh verity that slapped him on the face. Mikey was suppressing so much these past days, and they didn’t even bother to care about his feelings. They all knew how Mikey gets when they fight, yet they continued without considering it. If they were truly the good big brothers they claim themselves to be…

Then what the hell had they been doing?

Leo broke out of his train of thought, finally speaking, “We have some serious apologizing to do…”

Raph nodded, expecting this sentence, then his face twisted in a grimace, “I swear, when I know who the hell landed a finger on him, I’m gonna-”

Suddenly, the lab’s door burst open, to reveal a panicked Donnie with a T-phone in hand.

“DONNIE?!” Both brothers jumped to see what’s the matter.

“Guys, quick! Open the news!”

Leo rushed to open the TV without a complaint, while Raph did the exact opposite,

“Donnie! What’s goin’ on?! Is Mikey alright?!”

Much to the hot-head’s relief, Donnie nodded, “He’s stable for now. April called me and told me that something important is going on in channel 9.”

“Guys, check this out!” Leo called.

The purple and red clad approached. Raph didn’t sit down while Donnie took a seat beside Leo. The female reporter was now audible as they all silenced…

_“…With the bloodiest scene I’ve ever seen. Criminalists are now collecting the blood samples and discriminating the dead gang members from the alive…”_

The view shifted from the reporter’s face to an alleyway, one broken wall while anything elsewhere was in red. The three turtles gasped, while Donnie shouted, “QUICK, PAUSE!”

Leo did so and Donnie got near the Television, pointing at the corner of the screen while squinting his eyes, “Are those…”

“MIKEY’S CHUCKS?!” Raph was the one to conclude shockingly.

Donnie whipped his head, “His nun-chucks really _are_ missing!”

Leo’s head dazed, unpausing the TV screen. The view was now focusing on the gang members who received such fate, and boy how bloody they were…

“M-Mikey… did this?” Leo murmured in shock, alerting the other two, who had the same deadpan face he had. They were grasping the facts one by one, and were too out of it to focus on the reporter’s words.

_“…And it appears that two similar incidents occurred tonight. Here is one victim of one of the events…”_

Another woman appeared, who was too familiar…

“That’s the woman that was cornered in the alley!” Raph announced knowingly, “I-I never wondered where she went…” He continued more quietly.

_“Can you explain what happened exactly?”_

_“There were these four criminals who wanted me to hand them my purse. One of them knocked me out. I remember being picked up by another man outside the alley. He saved my life…”_

Raph’s eyes widened.

_“Don’t you remember any features about this ‘man’?”_

_“No, but whoever and wherever he is, I really thank him from all my heart. My purse held the most important treasure that belonged to my family, and if it wasn’t saved, I don’t know what I’d be doing right now…”_

The rest of the words were not comprehended by Raph’s mind, as he now knew that he had understood it all wrong. Leo and Donnie’s eyes landed on him, and red clad just couldn’t care less.

“Oh no…”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So, opinions? I feel bad for not including how stressed Donnie was while treating Mikey. Perhaps next chapter will be all about Mike’s treating session. Right now, I hope that this chapter wrapped everything up and made sense. There are still some secrets that haven’t been out yet. But that’s for another time! ;)


	6. Chapter 6

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for taking a break without a warning. I haven’t been so keen to keep this fic going, and for a moment I decided to abandon it. But nah! Came to my senses after some time. Chapter 7 may also be late. Here’s the warning, so don’t kill me please! Heh-heh! ^^”
> 
> I don’t have a medical degree! If there’s an error in some of the infos I wrote, please don’t come at me! This chapter is based on internet researches and nothing else.  
> Also, Splinter doesn’t have those weird powers of immediate healing. I’m sorry, but as I said, this has nothing to do with the episodes that followed The Gauntlet. So, I’m just gonna pretend that I never knew about this part.  
> But that doesn’t mean that I’m gonna exclude everything from the following episodes. Some basic facts are important, and I might even foreshadow some of them in the future chapters!

“My son…” Splinter murmured as he put a hand on Michelangelo’s head, feeling guilt wash over him. His other son, Donatello, was preparing the medical aid to start the treating session. Yoshi could see how the purple banded was trying really hard to push his emotions out of the way and concentrate, and how every time he saw his bloodied baby brother on the bed, he shivered. But the genius’s expression was, in fact, not mad or angry or stressed; just focused and determined.

Splinter backed away from the bed to free some space for Donatello, awaiting whatever his son would order him to do. Usually, it would be the opposite, but the aging rat knew that Donatello is the one who had the upper knowledge right now.

Donnie approached the bed quickly and silently, then connected his immediate younger brother to the heart monitor. As soon as the machine turned on, rapid beeping filled the room, announcing that Mikey’s heart was pounding at an abnormal speed.

“What is happening, Donatello?” Splinter was trying his best to keep calm, despite the panic rising in his stomach. He watched as his son ran to the other side of the lab to grab some medications.

“The pain is too much for him to handle!” Donnie explained frantically as he prepared a syringe, “Luckily, I have a plenty of Antiarrhythmic drugs, but I need you to hold him down, Sensei, in case he flinched.”

Splinter took no time to do as told, holding his youngest son’s wrists with not too much first. They were cold, freezing, and Splinter was sure that by the time they end the treatment, a fever was going to take over. Michelangelo suddenly shook while being held, as if knowing that he was going to get shot with a syringe…

Which was one of his biggest fears, actually.

Splinter’s heart broke as he tightened his hold, the feeling of forcing his son to do something he didn’t like was too much to handle. Michelangelo flinched once again, and again, now whimpering as the beeping dangerously turned red. Donatello finally had the syringe ready, and swiftly but steadily dug it into Mikey’s arm. It took some time before the youngest settled down, the monitor flashing green.

Splinter sighed as he felt the weigh on his heart fly free, letting go of the freckled turtle. He looked over Donatello to see him staring at his brother, deep in thought.

“What is going on in your head, my son?”

Donatello shook his head slightly, startled by his father’s voice. He wiped some water from his eyes before turning around to grab the necessary meds, “Nothing important, Sensei…” He muttered.

Yoshi frowned, sensing a great lump behind the genius’s straight face. It pained the rat to no extent, knowing that Donatello was forcing himself to not crumble into pieces in the sake of his brothers. Splinter wanted his son to cry, to scream, to at least let it out before he breaks down without his own body’s consent, but the wise father was fully aware that this wasn’t the right time at all; not when Michelangelo was completely relying on them.

The purple-banded soon sat on the chair and started removing Michelangelo’s gears. Splinter then followed suit, stripping the freckled turtle from everything except his orange mask. The old rat soon finished and looked up to see Donatello with a calculating, confused look, while holding Mikey’s belt.

Sensing his father’s urge to question, Donnie turned to him, “His nun-chucks aren’t here, nor is his T-phone; all I found is… this…” He said the last line slowly, opening his palms to show a completely bloody dagger.

Hamato’s eyes widened in confusion and surprise, watching as Donnie went to the other side of the lab and rested the foreign weapon on a counter, “I’m gonna run some tests later to see whose blood is this.” He mumbled, much to himself.

Shortly, Donatello began with cleaning the stabbed shoulder, so silent that a pin dropping on the ground could be heard. It didn’t take long before a knock on the door sounded,

“Donnie, do you need-” Leo’s voice was muffled.

“I’m busy here!”, Donatello frustratingly yet calmly replied, closing all chances for a conversation.

Seeing the obvious blood on Mike’s hand, Donatello was half-relieved that his brother had put pressure on his wound, otherwise the bleeding would have been more than severe. What troubled him now, though, was Mikey’s bulled wound and head. He was fearful of the fact of his brother having a concussion.

Trying to push his fears aside, Donnie almost forgot that his Master was right there and held his head with a grimace. He almost jumped when a hand was placed on his shoulder, and looked up to see his father looking down at him.

The purple banded wasn’t able to keep himself anymore. He shuddered violently as tears welled up in his eyes, clutched Master Splinter’s rope, bringing the rat to his knees. His cries were silent yet filled with relaxation,

“W-What if I fail Mikey, Master Splinter?” Donatello asked sadly, “What if I f-failed them all?”

Splinter’s heart was renting, “That would never happen, my son…” He tried to soothe him, caressing his head.

“It’s all my fault!” The turtle continued to cry, “I-I should have gone after him! I should have defended him! I’m such a t-terrible bro-”

“Yame!” Splinter shouted, silencing the turtle before he can continue. Don looked up at him as Splinter talked, “Never, and I mean never, say that sentence out in the loud, Donatello. I am here for you, my son, and so are Leonardo, Raphael and Michelangelo…”

He received a perplexed stare.

“Yes, Michelangelo is here for you,” Splinter said in a much calmer way, “He will be there when he wakes up, beaming with his smile that shines the lair every day. The thought of failure should never cross your mind, Donatello. You hold one of the strongest spirits, and one of the smartest minds. Don’t you ever use that in your disadvantage. Count on the positive possibilities rather than the negative ones, and believe in them with all you got.” He finished.

Donnie smiled sadly before wiping his face with the back of his hand, “Th-Thanks, Master Splinter. I really needed that…”

Not a moment later and Don was back in his seat, continuing his work. Rather than his soul being heavy, Splinter sensed determination, and a satisfied smile crossed his face.

Some minutes of silence passed, that of course without considering the knocking that would emit from the door. Donatello then shot up and ran for the small refrigerator that was in the corner of the lab. Splinter observed his son, and saw him coming back with two blood bags. The rat’s eyes widened as a question passed his mind,

“Should I get Leonardo, my son?”

The question wasn’t all that weird to Donnie. He knew that Leo was the only one who has the same blood type as Mikey.

“No, Sensei. We have enough blood stored for him. We don’t need to worry Leo more than he already is…” Donnie mumbled while working on the IVs.

Yoshi’s shoulders relaxed, coming up with another question, “How did you get Michelangelo to donate?”

Donnie snickered, knowing fully that Splinter wouldn’t believe him if he said that Mikey was the one to offer that.

But he wouldn’t lie to his father, “I’ve never asked him to.” Donnie said as he secured the IVs, smiling, “One day Mikey came to me with his tablet, telling me that he wanted to be a blood donor because it was ‘pretty cool and can help loooots of people’ or something…”

Splinter smiled as he pictured it in his mind, “And what did he do when he discovered that the matter needs pins?”

“He freaked out as expected,” Donnie shook his head upon the memory, “But he was determined to do it, so he calmed down almost instantly. Gotta say, I was surprised to see that he didn’t back away. I told him maybe for another time, but he wouldn’t let me,” He paused, “Eventually after _a lot_ of begging I gave up, and decided to grant his wish.”

Splinter’s face had a small smile, but was also astonished by the fact that his youngest son had suppressed his fear to do what he wanted. That was the thing about Michelangelo. He would do anything to reach his desire. It was one of his strong keys that Splinter wished Mikey would hold onto forever. Even if Michelangelo’s desires are dumb sometimes, there comes times in life when they wouldn’t be all that trivial.

“Two days later,” Donnie continued, snapping his Master out of his thoughts, “Leo came with a wound that required transfusion. Mikey was happy that he had helped him… more than happy.”

The tall rat closed his eyes and caressed his beard, the same small smile plastered on his face, “Michelangelo has a great heart, and I am certain that he would be delighted to help anyone…”

“Yup, that’s Mikey for ya’” Donatello grinned, returning back to cleaning the wounds after making sure that the blood was being transferred without problems.

After a brief moment of quietness, Donnie gave Master Splinter the choice to dismiss, saying that he wouldn’t need him much anymore. Splinter chose to stay for another ten minutes to check if everything was going well, before excusing.

**TMNT**

Donnie let out a breath, not realizing that he’d been holding it for so long. He’d managed to get the bullet out of Mikey’s lower side, but with such considerable effort. It was too deep inside, as if someone had buried it in there. Blood made its way out and the genius made his best attempts not to freak out before putting pressure on the wound, earning a low hiss from Mikey.

And another knock.

For the ninth time.

“WOULD YOU PLEASE LEAVE THE DOOR ALONE, LEO?!” He yelled angrily, failing to keep his cool anymore. He didn’t care how much time had passed, but he wanted to get this over with, and fast, or their baby brother was done for.

No answer came, and Donnie couldn’t have been more satisfied. He returned his focus on the wound, applying as much pressure as he could, and Mikey flinched beneath him. After a couple of seconds, the blood pour finally stopped, and Donnie swiftly got up to wash his hands before returning back to his chair, getting a wet cloth to wipe out the excess red liquid.

Once finishing, he brought the other end of the cloth to dry the wound, and then wrapped nonstick bandages to both it and the stabbed shoulder, finding a great lump taken away from him after ending the treatment.

Donnie sighed, feeling sudden tiredness coming over him. He should brace himself for the next wound, however, the one on Mikey’s head.

It didn’t need a scientist to tell that his skull was fractured, and that judging from the amount of blood, it could be diagnosed as a moderate or a severe traumatic brain injury. Donnie prayed to God that it was moderate, because if it was the other one, some bad stuff were about to get down.

Even though moderate head injuries aren’t all that pretty, and can have symptoms like vomiting, headaches, a short blackout, and loss of balance; severe ones can cause a deep coma, and that was only the beginning of it. Donnie wouldn’t want to think how they can cause seizures, problems with senses: like vision, taste, smell, etc.; or even the fact that it can pretty much cause post-traumatic amnesia-

“Okay, stop that!” Donnie talked to himself, deciding to clear his thoughts before starting the treatment. He would eventually know which kind of a head injury Mikey had once starting. He’d also have to do an X-ray to check for any brain damage…

“What brought us into this?” He mumbled, although knowing the answer.

**TMNT**

“OH MY GOD! THANK YOU!” Donatello raised his arms up, almost tearing out of joy. It was only moderate! No ripped, penetrated or torn brain tissues! No brain malfunctions! Nothing too severe!

Donnie double-checked the X-ray screen before him, making sure that he wasn’t delusional.

He wasn’t!

A sigh of relief escaped his throat as he rested his shell in the chair’s backrest, a hand over his heart. He’d never felt so alleviated in his life. His baby brother was going to be okay! Well, with some side effects, but okay!

Joy continued to make its way out as he was working, chuckling to himself and tears spilling before he wiped them fiercely. Resolution was there, and so being hope…

**TMNT**

“Just one more wrap…” Donnie muttered, making the final touch. The ministration was a success, and the purple-clad’s relief was beyond describable.

The pin was secured on the bandages, and finally, Donnie was done. He rubbed his eyes tiredly, looking up at the clock to see that he’d been contained in his laboratory for more than two hours.

Exhaling weakly, he looked over Mikey, deciding to stay for a little while to check that everything was alright. Blood pressure, medium. Beat rhythm, standard. Wounds, non were open. Temperature…

…not normal.

Mikey was running a fever of a 102°F.

It wasn’t due to his head injury, but rather due to his staying in the rain for too long. The genius decided to not do anything but wrap his baby brother with blankets, and when he wakes up, he would give him the proper medication for cold.

Right now, he just needed to rest.

He thought about bursting the lab door open, he thought about letting his brothers in and explain every detail that they logically wouldn’t comprehend; but… something was nagging him.

It wasn’t just the guilt eating him, it was something more; specifically, that over-all freak show they’d just encountered two hours ago.

It was weird, even for Donnie to see. Raph was the first one to have it, and then him and Leo started freaking out too. Next thing they knew; they saw Mikey in a really bad condition on the floor.

Maybe it was a side effect of their mutation? For all of them to have connective feelings, especially when sensing danger? But, if that was the case, how come none of them experienced it before? It wasn’t like that was the first time for one of them to get hurt like that… well not like _that_ , but at least hurt. Why wouldn’t their senses alert off when… let’s say, the Shredder was about to kill Leo off?

Some other thought nagged him. Splinter was the one who raised them, so it would make sense if he knew about this. Then again, as far as Donnie could remember, their Sensei had never had a conversation with them talking about ‘psychic instance’.

Donatello held his head. Damn, he was so exhausted even thinking made his brain hurt. He needed sleep; but of course he wouldn’t get some before giving the latest news to his brothers and Sensei.

He brushed a hand on Mikey’s forehead; still hot. He sighed slightly before lowering his hand to Mikey’s cheek softly, smiling as his brother drew closer to it as if it was the normal reaction to make.

“You’ve caused a big mess for such a bonehead…” He chuckled quietly, and stared at the smaller turtle for a while. His thoughts drifting back to the time they were all bickering on the rooftop.

A sad frown crossed his face.

It wouldn’t matter if he should apologize a hundred times, because he would do anything to be called a ‘geek’ by Mikey one more time. He would do anything to see that smile again. He would do anything for the sake of Mikey’s blue eyes appearing afresh.

And was hoping that his two other brothers were having the same thoughts.

“I hope you forgive me, Mike…” He whispered, landing his hand on Mikey’s, “And I hope I know who did this to y-”

_Beep-Beep-Beep_

The ringtone of his phone went off, and Donnie turned his head to see April’s photo flashing from it.

“April?!” He asked himself, more surprised than exhilarated, because it had been three days since he’d heard anything from her. He had tried to contact her multiple times, to see if she was okay after her father got kidnapped again, but she never answered. She didn’t even come to visit at all.

Donnie had mixed feelings about this call. He was happy that she finally contacted, but also… _angry_? Yeah, he was angry at her for ignoring him all this time, so he wasn’t sure if he should answer this one or not…

Deciding that not answering wouldn’t do him any good, Donnie sighed and got his T-phone,

“Hey, April? Something’s wrong?” His tone was tired, it was obvious.

_“Donnie, quick! Open channel 9! I think that someone has caught you again!”_

Without second thought, Donnie’s eyes snapped wide, pushing all the exhaustion away, “Alright, thanks April!”

_“Hey, are you okay?”_

If Donnie wasn’t so exhausted, he’d be squeaking and jumping around like a fan girl right now.

But he was so exhausted.

And he didn’t even know how to answer her question.

“No- Ye- Agh, I don’t know, April. Some stuff had been going on today. I may call you again and explain. Right now, thanks for the help.”

He didn’t even wait for her to reply and closed the line, pushed the door open and yelled,

“GUYS!”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> BAM! Donnie cried a lot in this fic, am I right? I feel that it would be logical considering that he’s, after all, the one treating Mikey; he’s the one who’s seeing the true damage that had occurred to him. And let’s not talk about the fact that he’s also treating his only younger brother.  
> So, I know what you’re thinking: “Hey, how come Mikey has a moderate brain injury?! That thing can cause memory loss, and probably some permanent disorders and blah blah blah…” Well, like it or not, Mikey’s gonna wake up just fine! No drastic changes, this isn’t the concept of my story! My story is just about that hurt/comfort juice and the sweet drama that comes out of it!  
> That April moment is basically my favorite in this chap. I’m sorry, but I’ve always seen April like some kind of a jerk, and that her relationship with the turtles –in the first episodes- was just a lean-on to get her father back. She definitely isn’t my fav…  
> BUT 2003 & 2018 APRILS?! THEY RULE, MAN!  
> Buckle up, boys, ‘cause things are going to get ugly from here! ^^


	7. Chapter 7

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chap is weird. Like, super weird…

R: I SHOULD’VE KNOWN!

L: Raph, please calm down!

R: I’m such a jerk!

D: Your guilt won’t change anything right now, Raph…

R: How could I even assume that Mikey left me in the middle of the fight?!

L: Would you please calm down?

R: But Leo-

L: No, trust me… Take some breaths, in and out… slowly…

…

L: Feelin’ better?

R: K-Kinda, yeah…

D: Now that you know the truth, what are you gonna do?

R: …

R: When will he wake up?

D: Based on my calculations, it can take from three to eight hours…

L: Which means either too late in the night, or too early in the morning…

…

R: Would you mind if I stayed with him?

D: Sorry, Raph, but I do. Since he’s running a fever, _I_ should stay with him and check on his temperature every now and then. The lab won’t hold the two of us…

R: I understand… but, can you do me a favor, and tell us immediately when he wakes up?

D: ‘Course, Raph. Wouldn’t have done anything else, anyway…

L: And what are you planning to do, tough guy?

R: Simple, apologize…

.

It wasn’t that simple…

**TMNT**

_Darkness invaded him, and he heard some quiet voices. He immediately recognized them, he always did, but something about their tone wasn’t usual…_

_It all started to clear out once the image was full, but kinda blurry, in his head._

_He couldn’t remember this place, or the place he’d been in, or where he was. All he could do was stare at the backs of the other three, seeing the blue-banded moving his mouth but couldn’t really manage the words he was saying…_

_Then, the purple-banded seemed to become angry, and the audio finally came back, filling the room,_

_“Why do I always get stuck with Mikey?”_

_“I don’t want him… and I’m in charge!”_

_“Well, then, let Raph take Mikey!”_

_“Over my dead body!”_

_It was just like a video being played, looped, then repeated. His eyes would only shift on them each time someone said a sentence, and it almost felt like he wasn’t there at all. Like an invisible ghost, a hologram. Being there or not, his presence wouldn’t matter._

_The scene before him suddenly shifted. The same poses, the same angered expression, almost as if it was the same video being replayed, but this time it was in a different setting…_

_He waited patiently for the audio to come back, because all he was receiving were furious looks, plus mouths moving in slow motion…_

_And it did after a while,_

_“I’m not gonna get paired up with him again! Donnie can be with him. I’m done!”_

_“Oh, so I just keep getting stuck with Mikey again?! Not gonna happen! Leo can have him.”_

_“NO!”_

_“Why not?!”_

_“I-I don’t know… I don’t want him…”_

_“And I’m not risking my life because of him! You’re the leader, you just said it, you have him!”_

_“Well, Donnie should be responsible for him as well, since he’s also in the B-Team.”_

_“If you’re just gonna throw away your problems on me, then fat chance!”_

_The scene didn’t repeat itself this time, but rather continued as it seemed like he was running away…_

_And he heard laughter from behind him…_

_“What a baby!”_

_“He’s gonna cry!”_

_“A hideous little freak!”_

_“Are you going to mommy?”_

_“You’re so weak!”_

_“Useless!”_

_“Disgusting!”_

_“Dumb!”_

_It continued as he ran, and their sounds didn’t fade away. In fact, they grew louder and louder, the mean laughter piercing his ear with each step he took. He promised himself not to cry, but he couldn’t help it; when the first tear dropped, the laughter turned psychotic…_

_“Who’s a crybaby?!”_

_“Such a whiny little guy!”_

_“Didn’t expect you to be such a sniveller!”_

_He came into a halt once he saw their shadows before him, in abnormal sizes, huge. The red one smirked as his eyes narrowed, looking down at him in such a mocking matter,_

_“Do you really think that we will accept such a weak, disgusting, wierdo like you?” It spoke, breaking into another fit of cackles._

_An image behind them played, showing a previous memory he had. The buff guy, Bradford, looking down mockingly at him, saying some similar words as the shadow:_

_“You actually thought someone like **me** could be friends with a freak like **you**? Pathetic!”_

_His head dropped and tears continued to spill. Too shaky to stand up, he fell to his knees, the laughter invading him and he held his head._

_“STOP! STOP IT!”_

_He screamed so loudly, trying to get his voice to distract him from the vociferous noises above him, but it just did a little progress. The shadows started to loom over him, engulfing him as his world started to fade…_

**GASP!**

His eyes opened.

Michelangelo’s breaths were frantic, his heart racing at the sudden wake-up-call he received. He shifted his eyes multiple times, trying to guess where he was. It wasn’t pitch black, but it was very dark.

His sense of hearing returned to him just as he barely calmed down, being greeted by a steady beeping sound. Scanning the room one more time, the familiarity of the scent and setting sent a sudden wave of all-knowing. He immediately knew where he was…

Home

‘ _No, no, no, no…_ ’ He thought, his heart pounding once again as he panicked. The beeping quickened and his eyes shifted. Holding on the bed sheets, he felt sweat roll down his face. He wasn’t sure if he was okay or hyperventilating, because he couldn’t stop his freak out.

He didn’t want to be here. He didn’t want to meet them. They saw him. They saw how bloody he was. They probably thought that he was weak. They probably thought that he’d lost. If he confronted them, they were going to lecture him. They were going to scold him.

‘ _NO!_ ’ Mikey screamed mentally, squirming in the bed just as so he was being restrained. Finally moving his head, Mikey tilted it from side to side, his eyes opening and closing several times. His breath was caught in his throat once he spotted Donnie sitting in front of a table, his head resting on both his arms. It was clear that the genius had worked himself to sleep as usual.

His body froze in place, even he couldn’t dare to breathe, yet the heart monitor was still beeping like crazy. Mikey instantly grimaced, and decided to force himself to calm down in hopes to not wake his brother up. Taking a few deep breaths in and out, his heart started to slow down steadily.

With the final huff, Michelangelo let the bed sheets go. He was still shaking like a leaf, but at least his mind was clear enough for him to think.

This had been a dream, he knew it; but even though dreams weren’t usually things he would read too much into (most of them are about pizza, video games, toe names, etc. anyway), he had always felt that they had deeper meanings into them. Master Splinter would usually tell them that dreams can be messages, or warnings, or just totally harmless. And because he had spent those several days stuck to Master Splinter’s side, Mikey couldn’t help but revise this sentence.

Those words… The things the shadows had said had hit him close to home. ‘Useless’, ‘disgusting’ and ‘dumb’. It sounded so much like their brothers’ comments about him; just as if Donnie, Leo and Raph were only hinting at it but truly wanted to say them.

What if this dream wasn’t a harmless one or a message, but a warning? What if this day would come, when his brothers would want to get rid of him? He had longed for home once he had beat those Purple Dragons, and was hoping to embrace his brothers once he saw them, but he didn’t have the chance to even talk for them for a little bit. What if they hadn’t reacted at all? What if they had just thrown him to Donnie and even Donnie was too annoyed with this-

A sudden headache attacked him, and Mikey winced at the sharp pain. It seemed like his senses were beginning to come back.

And his train of thoughts didn’t take too long to return...

He loved his brothers, he truly did, and they knew it; but the same couldn’t be said for him. He wasn’t sure if his brother saw him as an important part of the family, he wasn’t sure if they would care if for some reason he quit the team. Would there be any difference? Would they be upset? Questioning those things was proving that… Mikey didn’t know his worth to his own brothers. They rarely showed affection, unlike him, and would always get stern or comment about every wrong thing he said or did.

Yes, he’d been living with them this whole life and yes, he knew that they loved him; then again, all that was before going on topside for the first time. First day of patrol, though, Leo became leader; and when Leo became leader, Raph became more uptight; and when Raph became more uptight, Donnie isolated himself a lot more; and when Donnie isolated himself, Mikey became the punching bag they all leaned on when being upset…

Maybe that was his role. Maybe it was him being the one lifting the weight off their shoulders. Mikey had been living with this belief for his whole life… until the day when they had confronted the Shredder.

Being thrown around like a dummy, being insulted too many times, being smacked more than once. It was too much. Even when this was his role, they should at least wait for him to perform it. He could come up with so many ways to comfort them or lift their wild tension; howbeit, being hit every time he talked and not allowing him to do that himself broke his nerves.

Mikey wouldn’t deny making mistakes that day, big ones, but even so, he relied on accepting them and training harder with his father, to become better…

Too bad his brothers didn’t give him a chance to show them what he had learned…

Worst part, he didn’t have anyone to talk to about these stuff. Master Splinter existed, yeah, and would be more than willing to listen to him, but Mikey would feel bad if he involved his father in this mess. Something Mikey had realized those past three days, that his dad wouldn’t get in between Raph and Leo’s fighting until it turned serious. Perhaps that had something to do with development, wanting his sons to figure things out on their own; and Mikey wasn’t sure if they would ever.

Still, that was away from the point. Mikey didn’t want to involve Master Splinter, and sure as shell didn’t want to involve April either. April was a great friend and all, but Mikey wasn’t too comfortable with sharing secrets with her, especially if it associated with something about his brothers. He feared that maybe she would tell Donnie something (now that they were kinda close), or even Leo or Raph. So, taking advice from her wasn’t the best option.

And that leaves him alone…

He was being conflicted right now, because he had two choices to make at this point; but what about those other times when his brothers _did_ treat him well? He shouldn’t ignore them, of course, but they were too little and brief compared to those _other_ times…

Maybe… he should go with the latter choice…

Yeah, that was what he was going to do. Because… he was no use. His choices didn’t matter. His opinions didn’t matter. Which meant… his whole existence didn’t matter.

And at that point… he didn’t care what the others might think.

He was going to leave.

Tonight.

Mikey still couldn’t feel his limbs yet, and wasn’t certain he could to stand up at all. His shoulder stung, his head span, and his abdomen would constantly jab him with a wave of pain. Mikey knew, however, that this was still the mild stage and the _real pain_ was going to come round sooner or later.

Starting to move his body, Mikey propped himself up, being extra careful about moving his left arm. Now, Mikey just realized how hot he was. He was sweating too much, and puffing air as if he’d gone to a five-star sauna. It was a good probability that he’d come down with a fever. After all, he’d been in the rain for more than an hour, and after that, he had walked on sewer water to get home.

After great attempts of pushing, Mikey found himself sitting on the bed. The three blankets that covered him slid down, exposing his chest. Shaking slightly, Mikey was half-relieved half-aggravated at the cool air that greeted him. His side wound hurt him as he straightened himself, and he put a hand on it, then stopped. Looking down and getting his palm off his abdomen, Mikey stared at his hand, seeing the obvious scrapes and scars. He remembered their causes.

Mikey wasn’t sure if Donnie had missed them, or had just been too lazy to wrap them up. Another mental grief washed over him. His knuckles _did_ hurt. He winced.

Kicking the blankets off, he sat at the edge of the bed, his toes almost touching the floor. He anxiously observed Donnie while lowering his legs, making sure that he was as silent as possible. Donnie could be a light sleeper if he needed to, and a heavy sleeper when he wanted to. Not sure which case it was this time, Mikey chose the hard way to be safe. Once making contact with the ground and straightening himself, Mikey wobbled back and forth, his headache getting worse as he tried to take a step. The freckled terrapin suppressed saying anything like ‘woah’ or even yelp.

He held the bed he was just laying on for support, concluding that this wasn’t going to be as easy as he thought. Inhaling deeply, Mikey started taking small steps, heading out of the lab. His eyes frequently flipped back to Donnie, observing any signs of the genius waking up.

As if the youngest terrapin would be able to do anything if his brother _actually_ woke up. Mikey was barely holding himself, one palm on the wall and another on his side. He felt some familiarity in the events, almost déjà vu. That was the same pose he’d been in while coming back to the lair, the only difference was that he’d been completely wet and bloodied…

Sending a final glimpse at his sleeping brother, Mikey finally stepped out of the lab, a cold breeze hitting him just as he did that. It was definitely colder out of the lab, and much colder outside the lair. Huh… Maybe he should wear something. But the thought of going to his room scared him. What if someone realized? What if it Master Splinter woke up? Or Leo? Shell, what if _Raph_ woke up? He couldn’t risk being spotted out of the medical bed which he surely wasn’t allowed to get up from. They would scold him a few times and shove him back to Donnie, who will yell at him for no end. And that was _the best_ _case scenario_.

So… what was he going to do…?

He stopped. He really needed to get to his room. He had to grab a few things. While thinking this through, Mikey almost jumped and screamed when something brushed his leg. Looking down on it, his heart slightly settled when he saw that it was just Spike, crawling on him…

“Hey, little guy…” He greeted with an unfamiliar hoarse tone, and the older turtle greeted back by looking up at him. A smile cracked Mikey’s lips, then disappeared immediately. He was going to miss it here…

A while passed, and Mikey finally made up his mind. He already had the necessities of food and water in where he was going to head, so he could just secretly come back anytime later and bring what he needed. He didn’t have to pack his whole bedroom. Though he would’ve been glad if he could.

In that little stroll towards the lair’s entrance, Mikey would constantly get hit with a wave of nausea that made him want to throw up, feel the pain of his shoulder or his bullet wound worsen, or a mix of the three. It was really hurtful and frustrating to the point of his legs almost giving out every now and then. Yet he tried his best to cope with it.

He was watching his home while walking, as if he was seeing it for the first time. Mikey’s feature gloomed so much that he was about to cry. But, no matter what, he wasn’t going to cry. He wasn’t a kid, he wasn’t a baby like his brothers presume. Taking in a deep breath, the freckled turtle forced his tears in, just like he was trying to control the lump in his throat; and he finally reached the lair’s huge door, leading to the subway.

He stopped, looking over Spike who had been following him. He shook his head at him slowly and averted his eyes as a message of telling him ‘you stay here’. Spike seemed to get the message as he turned around and steadily headed for Raph’s room. Mikey gave a quiet, teary chuckle,

‘ _I’m sorry, everyone…_ ’ He thought gloomily, ‘ _And especially you, Master Splinter. You don’t deserve this… You never deserved me…_ ’

Before landing his foot outside.

.

.

.

Unbeknownst to him, two narrowed eyes were observing him in silence…

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> No, Mikey, you idiot! What are you doing??
> 
> Chapters with no dialogues really hurt my brain…
> 
> So, something I wanted to talk about here was Mikey’s dream. You realize how his brothers were referred to as ‘shadows’, ‘purple-banded’ and ‘blue-banded’, yet Bradford is just Bradford? That’s because Mikey still didn’t want to grasp the fact that those who are hurting him are his brothers. He believes that only a part of his brothers are hurting him: their demons, their shadows, their dark sides, and not them as a whole. Bradford? Bradford was an over-all demon to Mikey.
> 
> But who knows how long will it take Mikey to have the same thoughts about his brothers? ;)

**Author's Note:**

> Contact me on Twitter! You can find me [@UniPopcorn1414](https://twitter.com/UniPopcorn1414)! <3


End file.
